i_hate_the_world47 Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 Hi guys.I hope you all like the poem but even if you dont try to give some feed back good or bad. Bye Daddy The pain I just cant take it The beatings to severe That's fine ignore me As you grab another beer This time its different Your screams and your yells You can take it all with you On your trip to Hell I cant take it dad I love you so Even when you hit me Or call me a ho But I am done daddy This fight you have won Just answer me one more question Where is the gun? I am leaving daddy My life is done ring the bell But I will remember you As I burn in my fiery jail hope to here from some1 soon Meagan Link to comment
hurtabandoned Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 It seems to be written with alot of emotion. It makes you think. I read it twice. It's good work but it tells a very sad story. Keep writing. -Hurt Link to comment
onthetrail Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 wow.... it does make you think a bit... it seems to be full of emotion and possibly based on life happenings i don't know but it is a great poem... Link to comment
i_hate_the_world47 Posted July 5, 2004 Author Share Posted July 5, 2004 I am glad you enjoyed my poem.Yes it is written from true life.My stepfather used to beat me.I have another poem like this one.Though it has a different meaning it is based on tur life. Link to comment
sarahmaria Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 hey, its smart and good.. you have talent for someone your age.. i am sorry to hear that this was once true but am glad you didn't have to reach for a gun... good job Link to comment
i_hate_the_world47 Posted July 5, 2004 Author Share Posted July 5, 2004 Thanx guys for all your comments.I my self didnt really like this poem.I wrote it mainly out of hatred and anger.But i am glad you all like it. Meagan Link to comment
dpressedone89 Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 yeah its an awesome poem. i love it. writing is a good way to get feelings out.i wish i had talent like yours. i hope you keep writing. -sTiTcHeS Link to comment
upset_depressed_suicidal Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 i really liked ya poem it shows the emotion of it all very vrey wel done! Link to comment
fallenwhitelighter Posted July 5, 2004 Share Posted July 5, 2004 i can not in anyway say that it has happened to me, but saying i feel sorry for you is an understatement; it can hurt when someone you love so much (ie your family) can cause you so much pain, but as life is full of pain but also joy, you can let one pain, determine or define your life... Even through the pain you should find a hope, a faith; a hope that your dad can change or will change in the future, and faith that there will be better times ahead... Hence your meer future may seem bleak but as there are always brights lights at the end of the tunnel, you should see past the pain and find that light, that hope and that faith. Through your pain now, you should not do anything which is detrimental or self-destructive because you are not just hurting yourself, but you are not respecting yourself... So to end, find a hope which can guide you, and respect yourself, and find the strenght to with stand and prevail..... Best of luck... 8) Link to comment
i_hate_the_world47 Posted July 5, 2004 Author Share Posted July 5, 2004 Thanx for everyones comments.I have gotten a few pm's asing if this poem is written on experiasnce and yes it is.But my stepfather is long gone. Link to comment
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