I feel wreckless right now.....

[Shinobie]

Im so fricken tired of this CRAP im getting close to it......Im looking through drors right now for pills and i dont wanna be here anymore im getting so strained and depressed i dont know why i am.Everything is just going wrong and becoming so truthful to me on how everythign is.If i was able to get my hands on some pills id prolly do it but.... since the last time my brother tried to kill himself my mom hides the pills....maybe i should use somehting else but things like knives im scared of

[Hannibal]

Dude trust me its not worth it. Sure things get rough and everything seems to go wrong at once, but just try and remember that usually a bunch of good things happen soon after. Wouldn't you rather be around to find out what those good things are?

 

Let us know how you are feeling and why it is.

 

Talking about it helps, killing yourself doesn't.

[Shinobie]

The thing is things like this always happena dn never stop its not sometimes.JUst last week i was int eh same depressive state.Its always happened to me all my life and never stops.Nothign ever becomes good of anything,im never ever able to advance to hav what other people have i stay int he same plcae...

[kramz1098]

dont kill urself man theres so many better things you can find in life dude. find a hobby you like and do it when you feel down

[wlfpack81]

*excuse any misspelled words, I'm buzzed/drunk as I type this*

 

I khow how you feel Shinobe. I've been a punk "female dog" all my lfe and right nwo as i type with 8 or 9 beers (can't remembef) in me I feel like slittin the wrists or doing somethng stupid. I hate being a paethic shell of a man w/ no freaknig girl. Sucks..only thing that evne helps keep me here is the fact I have some young nieces and a nephew who'd be devastated if I die otherwise I'd be out of this crappy world.

[Shinobie]

I have hobbies i like such as playign comp games and hanging out with friends but all they ever do is make me depressed with all the jerks and stuff...Anything i do is effected by other thing si cannot enjoy anything and i cant get girls off my mind and cant get wanting to be with one off my mind its impossible...

[wlfpack81]

shinobe try beer it helps..lol

 

btw I see yoour avtar is a soul calibur character (nly nerds like us know that). I have SC for DC and SC2 gor the gamecube...great games..if i only i could be a hero like the fictious chartacters in those games..lol

[Shinobie]

I didnt know it was off of soul caliber i only used it because it looked lieka ninja an dreminded me of shinobi.Im some what of a nerd for the fact that i play games and liek certain things abotu computers>but i do have an atheletic self inside of me like in football and baseball.And i am usuallyvery coorddinated in that but up here no one plays these sports...They just sit around,work,smoke pot,go out with girls,and computers....So i chose to play computer games and work because i dont really have a chance with a girl liek i said i couldnt prolly get one if my lif depended on it...and extremlly dislike pot....Id only use drugs to kill myself...

[i_hate_the_world47]

[ b] DONT use knives or pills or ne thing. dont try to kill ur self take it from me i truied once and all i got was 2 nasty scars and 3 years of thwerapy. besides think of who u r hurting ur family and friends. its just not worth it so stop and think about it all the consequences =; [/b]

[Shinobie]

People always tell me that "it gets better" but whenever it seems to get a lil better i get smashed down by something into depression.Like just a few weeks ago i was feeling depressed again because i really would liek to go out with someone.One day i get to go with some girl and my friends to do things in a town near mine on his birthday and that day turns into hell again and i come home extremely depressed for soem reason and just lay down and feel down liek everythign is hopeless.I get a chance with another girl a week later and im happy again but then when i go out with her i dont really know how to strike conversation or do anything because im such a clueless pathetic male.So it ends up that night she seems to have a better time with other guys sinc ei was out with friends again and some of their dates so she sits away and talks to friends without dates and has a great time.So i just go walking around the theatre area feeling really down and then i come back into the theatre and sit down in the front because i dont wanna sit up there with all of them.I just come home feeling really down again>its just an everlasting chain its so impossible for me to be happy for bout a month because im always feelign down.Like sometimes being with friends puts me down and my mom makes me feel down whenevershe gets mad even on the nights i come home feeling like crap.I mean wow i hear 12 year olds talkign bout girls and going out already and im here sitting at the age 17 never having much interaction with women.I can just believe how u guys feel who r 26 id cut the line of my life right then and there at that age....I mean just a yougin knowing more then me such as my sister always going out with guys makes me feel horrible.