Getting back together story - and long distance!

[Allyo]

I remember posting on here a while back about my situation. I started going out one of my friends and fell completely in love with him. It seemed to me like he was the perfect match! We got along great, and he always told me that he loved me and that he had always wanted a girlfriend like me.

 

The only problem was that at the end of August (this month) he was going to graduate and most likely leave the city to go live with his sister and find work. We are in the same master’s degree program, but I graduate a year later. He told me that he didn’t want a long distance relationship, and since he pretty much told me that from the start of the relationship it soon turned into a source of conflict. He told me that he didn’t think a long distance relationship would work out and that he was afraid of getting more attached to me and then having to leave in August. So we broke up.

 

At first I was consumed with thoughts of how to get him back. I was so confused at how he supposedly could have such strong feelings for me yet wouldn’t even be open to the idea of trying a long distance relationship. I wasn’t sure it would work, but I was always willing to try.

 

We basically had several periods of no contact, low contact, and then we just started full on dating. We missed each other a lot, and we ended up seeing each other knowing that he would be leaving eventually and that that would be the end of the relationship.

 

Yet during this whole time, several guys had become interested in me. I wasn’t ready to date other people for a couple months, but finally I started going out with one guy even though I wasn’t super into him. I was completely honest with the my ex, and I told him that I cared for him but that I wanted to try to be with other people if we weren’t going to work out in the future. At that point, I genuinely just wanted to try dating new people and to see how it would go.

 

Following that I went on a four week vacation and had absolutely no contact with my ex. I decided that the new guy wasn’t right for me and cut him off. When I got back home and saw my ex it was almost like he had a revelation! He was attentive, sweet, and he did not want to leave my side or “let me get away again.” He basically said that he loved me and had missed me so much during those four weeks that he realized that he wanted to be with me. He was willing to try a long distance relationship and even willing to see if we would eventually end up in the same city together.

 

Like everyone says, it was only in the moment that I completely gave up on him and had a sort of “carefree” attitude did he come back. I decided that I could live without him, didn’t need him, and that I was perfectly happy on my own!

 

I don’t want to get too excited since the situation is far from ideal… especially considering that he only wanted to come back after no contact and after getting jealous from me going out with somebody else. But I still believe in second chances, and in my mind I’m convinced that we are such a good match that it is worth it!

 

I know reading reconciliation stories always made me feel better when I was down about my breakup, so here is mine… but this has confirmed to me that being genuinely happy with yourself, whether single or in a relationship, is one of the most attractive traits that you can have

[TSandullo]

I decided that I could live without him, didn’t need him, and that I was perfectly happy on my own!

 

being genuinely happy with yourself, whether single or in a relationship, is one of the most attractive traits that you can have

 

Those lines of yours stood out to me most girl.

 

Well done and all the best.

 

TS