Excellent realization

[k33]

I don't think I want him back. I don't think he deserves me after all the crap he's been pulling.

 

Man that feels good. First good thought in 10 days.

 

 

[under_the_pressure]

Wow, I'm proud of you. Some people never realize or think that. I'm happy for you! Intelligent.

 

~Under~

[Gilgamesh]

You are starting to see the light!!!

 

Also realize, he cannot hurt you no more, because he is gone, and all he did is in the past.

 

Also realize, he isnt who you were in love with, would the person you love do what he did? of course not!, so you are not loosing anything, anly the illusion he created for you.

 

Also realize, that for every door that closes, another will open, and you will know better what to look for and stay away from once you walk through it.

 

Also realize, that there is someone perfect for you out there somewhere, and as soon as you can stop looking back, and face forward the sooner you will meet the real thing, eventually you will have exactly what you expected from the ex, and probably a lot more.

 

Also realize, we will be here when you need us

[Kittengirl]

That's great news. I think you will have many times in the next few months where you miss him, want him back, regret your decision and feel very lonely and sad at what has happened. That's how I felt when it finally sunk in that my relationship couldn't be maintained by me alone and that I would be better off in the long run just walking away.It was the right decision it just took me a while to believe it. I have now met the most kind and wonderful man and gave him such a hard time when we first met due to what I had experienced with the ex, but he persevered and we are happy and looking to the future together. My new guy has also been married twice before and had said he would never do it again but since we met his views have changed. This will happen for you too, give yourself time and don't be too hard on yourself. You have been through an awful lot and need time to get yourself back together. So proud of you you've come a long way.

x

[brokenpogostick]

i'm so proud of you! that's great! nothing is more painful than a nagging feeling of regret, but hey! you're past that, you're awesome! things will get better, just you wait & see! there's a man out there that would give the world to you & he'll come eventually

[k33]

Thanks! I feel kind of strong and sure of myself. Could all change, but I doubt it. It was a great relationship at first, but then it fell apart because he wouldn't compromise. And he drank too much.

 

"I have now met the most kind and wonderful man and gave him such a hard time when we first met due to what I had experienced with the ex, but he persevered and we are happy and looking to the future together. "

 

I can totally see this happening for me, one of my best friends told me that I will be so hard on the next guy. Trust is going to be a REAL issue for awhile.

 

I am going to just do for myself and if a guy comes along, super, if not, I am going to enjoy myself and do the things I have always wanted to do.

 

The only bit of advice I have for others in the same predicament is to think about the bad stuff. It is so easy to focus on all the gorgeous wonderful things in the relationship. To get past it think of the bad for a while so you don't forget. There are ususally reasons he/she left, or the relationship ended.. so think about it, and think about if you want to deal with it again, and think about if you want to feel the way they made you feel.

 

In my case the fighting and the emotional turmoil is not something I want to repeat. The good times, absolutely I want to repeat them, but they were too few and far between lately. And as much as it all hurts, it's better to get out with some feeling of love for the person left.