Mom knows how to push buttons and doesn it

[ATLstudent]

Why is my mom pushing my buttons. This is just getting so old. I guess she was bullied, i know she had some abuse. And it seems like she now abusing me...in the form of i dunno what...but she pushes my buttons....i know shes doing it.....she likes to bother me. SO WHAT DO I DO TO HELP THIS....IT REALLY BOTHERS ME AND SHE KNOWS IT.....I NEED SOME ADVICE....as i am somewhat living at home....i guess moving out would be number one...???? Has anyone else had this experience....I am her son, why is it the closet people can get to you the most..?

[crispyO]

listen my friend. I just turned 20 and I learned to deal with that kind of issue years ago.

First, cut all the emotional connections.

second, learn to distract your mind to something else when that happens.

third, or you can just move out.

or better yet, you can talk it out and tell her it really hurts and makes you want to cry when she does that and tell her to stop being mean because you love her.

[FathomFear]

Two questions:

 

1) What buttons do you have?

2) Which ones are she pushing and why?

[arcadefire]

Yes, this is called verbal abuse. The only way to stop it is to first tell her that you do not tolerate her hurtful words, such as insulting, guilting, belittling, etc. If she continues, refuse to listen to her and walk away / hang up the phone. You need to set boundaries (you are 24), and if she doesn't respect that as an adult to another adult then she needs to know that you refuse to play her game by just walking away from that situation.