I like my best friend

[sj9ers]

Ok so I first met this girl 3 years ago in the summer of 07 at my job through mutual friends that we had. At first she thought I was cute and wanted to go out with me and I really liked her but a combination of too many people getting involved and me not really knowing what to do ended that and we never got past the "talking" stage. Well we didn't talk for a few months and worked together again the next summer and became close friends starting then and we didn't like each other anymore. We've been pretty much best friends since and hang out and talk a lot.I had have been pretty much single up until January when my friend introduced me to one of her co workers who I am now dating.

 

A couple of months ago her bf of 2 years broke up with her and me and her have been hanging out a lot more and spending time together, and I'm starting to really like her. It's been bugging me because I'm going out with someone else right now, and my friend calls me her best friend and her brother. However she'll say things about how lucky the girl I'm seeing is too have me, and before she said she would date me if she was single, but she also says stuff about how we would never date if people ask and how it would be really weird if we did.

 

Also the other night when I was taking her to get coffee I was talking to her about the current girl I'm dating because she asked and I said I don't where it's going and I asked her who I should date if the girl I'm going out with doesn't work out and she said "me" as in her, but I couldn't tell if she was joking so I kinda just laughed it off and switched topics.

 

I really want to tell her how I feel about her but I don't know if I should. I'm worried it would ruin the friendship and make things really awkward because we have a really close knit group of friends and if things get awkward between me and her it will just make everything weird. I want to ask my other friends for advice but I'm afraid that it would make it back to her that I like her.

[Flint_Wood]

I went through a situation very similar to this and it ended pretty badly. My friend was into me and I fell for her. The relationship didn't last long, there's a lot of stress on a new relationship under the type of conditions you describe. Whenever you start dating a friend their is a risk that the friendship may be lost, at least for some time. One of my mistakes though was that I didn't really communicate with her well (in terms of what we were both expecting out of the relationship).

 

If you are comfortable with the risk, my advice is to flirt with her more and see how she reacts. If she's not running for the hills, go for a kiss. This is the time to talk and figure out what you both want. You can take back a kiss without much drama, but it gets much more complicated if you let it get past that point.

 

Hope this helps.

[preciousgirl82]

Very similar situation here. Im about to become engaged to my best friend who ive known since i was 10 years old. We took a huge risk getting together but so far it has worked out for us. We've felt both the negatives and positives of dating your close friend. The relationship tends to run smoother than the average because you already know eachother so well, but on the other hand there were times when we knew that breaking up would be extra hard for us so we jumped through hoops to avoid it. Its hard to think that you break up with someone and you lose your best friend at the same time. Make sure that this girl feels the same exact way that you do to prevent any awkward situations that can potentially ruin this friendship. If you do decide to get together make sure you both understand the risks and talk about how you'd handle things if you decided to break up.