Not as bad as before...but...

[bungalo]

Still adjusting to being alone. Hit me a little while ago...that I've been coming to this site (off and on) for nearly 6 years! It's been so good to vent, and learn from other peeps perspectives..and it's also been a pleasure to help out my fellow sufferers whenever possible . SO...the real reason for this post...and I'm requesting up-front to not be cyber slapped, and told to move on (this is helping me move on ...maybe!)...but in any case...the question which I am painfully embarrased to ask right now (and I might have a little too much time on my hands at the moment) is:

 

Has anyone ever had multiple breakups and recons and finally reconciled for good?

[sweeteyez]

Hi There,

 

I as well have been on this site for about 6 years now. My ex and I have broke up and made up many times. This time its been the longest at 2 years(actually over 2 years) Within that 2 years we did see each other maybe 5 times in total.

Every time I would allow him back into my life, he would not be ready...yet again..

 

However something in him has changed.. or maybe it was me. I finally gave up on the idea of "us" .

 

moved on really started dating ect ect. Then in March my father passed away very suddenly. i reached out to my ex, I just had to. Since then we have been talking and spending alot of time. He has matured over the last 2 years, and I think I was just ready to move on.

 

We are not officially back together but its leading there.. we will see.

 

I do know that if it doesn't end well,i will NEVER cry over him like i did. i know I can survive. YOU CAN TOO!!!

 

 

[bungalo]

Wow Sweet...that's quite a story..This third go around for me..(and yes she did try to break up once before the final break June 21..I got her to reconsider) I almost felt like cueing the laugh track on a situation comedy or something...Like..oh yeah? How many times have we been through this before?? Uh huh...over for good you say? Ok, see you later!..

 

If you check my posts between Nov last year and April of this year...you will definitely see a more somber tone..so I'm with you Sweet...I will survive no matter

what....

[sweeteyez]

Aww you will. I know its sucks when people say that. I literally wanted to punch people in the head lol...

 

Life is short... yes blah blah blahh we have both heard it. Just do your thang!!!

 

Feel free to chat me up anytime

[lostnscared]

I'm wondering the same thing. My guy has broken up with me multiple times. As pathetic as it is I hope that we can EVENTUALLY get back together. The mistake I've made in the past is getting back with him less than 3 weeks after we broke up. This time I won't get bak with him so quick.

[TurtleDove12]

Has anyone ever had multiple breakups and recons and finally reconciled for good?

 

We can slap you as much as you want, but you better slap yourself, because you won't ever move on if you keep holding on to this hope.

 

Honestly man. This is not something that's just going to get better. It doesn't just get better. You have to make it better. It's not going to happen by itself.

 

And that abusive ex who dumped you off yet again. She's not going to "come around" and she's not sitting around waiting for you.

 

So be her friend. Help her heal. And **** on yourself in the process. These thoughts will eat you alive if you keep them.

[zinny]

I am somewhat reconciled with my ex.... the one who was the reason for me coming here in July 2009.

 

I'm not going to rehash my story... but it plays out like this.... in the beginning I was his number one and I didn't treat him the same. Then things happened, other people got involved (his ex) and he broke up with me and then treated me like garbage. We were on, off, on, off, FWB, off, on, and so forth. It was a vicious cycle and I lost all respect for myself and became a doormat, just to have him in my life, even though he brought his ex back into his life. I thought I would accept just a piece of him because it was enough.... but I was a robot out of fear. I cried wolf a lot when he disrespected me, but then begged him to keep me in his life when he didn't seem to want me back or not to leave.

 

One day I opened my eyes and realized I was so NOT happy.... we were still off at that point. He kept me on a string but wouldn't commit because of his "issues". His ex remained around. I had enough and I walked away. For real. No hot air, no smokes and mirrors. I was done. I didn't explain why, I just was. No long winded emails. No talks about me going NC. I just slowly became distant, I started to really date and I began to live again.... and when I did that... the distance just happened naturally.

 

He then pursued me again and I told him to go away and clean up all his messes and issues with the ex.... and should he still want me then and should I still want him... we could see what happens then.

 

He has done all that... he has returned and he's trying so hard. I was so hesitant at first, I ruled my heart with an iron fist. I trusted him zero percent and I told him all of this. He understood and still wanted us to try and we casually dated while I still dated others. I wasn't ready to jump back in, I wasn't ready to give him my heart.... but slowly... I'm starting to try back.

 

Are things perfect? No... but are things healthier between us? Yes.... We both know what we need in life. We are both honest with what we can give and what we expect to receive. We are starting from scratch, erasing the past and dating again... and we've come to the point where we are dating only each other.

 

It's been a slow, long and painful road. But we are rebuilding... whether or not we get our happily ever after together is yet to be seen... but I know no matter what.... I will get MY happily ever after because I finally know what I'm worth.