People that Pry at You

[ATLstudent]

So had some good friends growing up, big drinkers.

Now an ex partyer i have rekindled a few of these friendships.

I have some questions about my sexuality and still cant really classify myself...as bi, gay, straight or what.

 

Anyway told on the people from this group about that aspect of me.

A year later another one comes to me and asks me if I am gay....and tells me that the one guy i told my concerns to...told him.

 

Ok...so then i open up to him about what i feel about it, and what i told the first friend. Ok.......but then he keeps repeating himself( keep in mind intoxicated to a certain point). JUst keeps rehashing it...."i wanted to bring it up, afraid u you scared to tell us" over and over......conversation is basically me opening up about my feelings and him saying....that over and over. Ok. Keeps saying that i should tell the other friends too, are u going to tell him, u should.......this bothers me....i will tell people about myself when i feel an impulse to.

 

 

 

Then he brings it up after a late night of beers, i am sober. Again the same thing, and reveals that the other friend of the group knows about this. And keeps saying: so do u want me to tell him that you know he knows and we are talking about it.....when are u gonna tell him"

why is so concerned with this.....and why does he keep repeating himself.....I wanted to bring it up so you knew me and the other guys dont care.....so when are u gonna tell so and so..

 

This started to feel really invading and i got that helpless, shock feeling, that leaves me with a very small voice, and feeling really weak and vulnerable. It was really intrusive.

 

Then started bring up me talking about girls and he didnt want me to be putting anything on for him.....like saying i liked girls just to look cool.....

well i explained that no, i have attractions toward females, and i am being authentic when i say that......Then he brought up a recent occasion...."ya know when u said u were taking that girl to the movies....didnt want u to be saying it was a girl if it wasnt.....i mean u could tell us whatever....just wanna say we dont care"

 

And what is being said by words seems really caring, but the way it was said....and repeating the word gay and gay over and over...when i never stated i was.....and just bringing it up......why.....when i didnt mention it.