Long distance relationship

[asiandragon]

hi i am a guy and im new to this website... well im in a long distance relationship... started when i was 17 im now 22... we met at my friends party and we just started talking to each other everyday and were seeing each other everyday, but we werent dating...

 

i was never the best bf... i never did ask her out but i kissed her one time and we both agree to make that our anniversity...i was never romatic nor got gifts or flowers to her... so yes i wasnt very good but i like to think of myself as an inexpereience bf who didnt know any better...

 

Well after the kiss we dated for 3 months and during the 3 month i drove her everywhere litterally paid for everything and was basically with her 24/7 as much as possible... even when i have late nights at work i wake up early mornings just for her to drive her to school, so the 3 month was probably the best 3 month of my life in my opinion as this was the first time i had someone this special and it is the longest relationship so far... no she isnt my first girl friend she is my second gf....

 

if you read on the story you will see taht i am a very bad bf but i dnno i just want people opinion as i cant tell any friends(who are girls) because i dont want them judging me and i dont tell any of my guys friends as NO ONE knows about our relationship.. the 3 month of dating we didin't tell anyone because it was her choice in keeping us quite because she was embarassed and i was happily to comply with that as i was her first bf so our relationship started secrect and still is sercret as we are now in long distance...

 

We went to picnics, parks, zoo, clubs, gatherings, beach basically everything a normal couple would do...then she left to over seas and both decided to continue our relationship long distance... on the second last day we were together i got all her frineds my friends together to hvae a bbq gathering in her departure... and on the last day i drove her and two friends to teh airport where i wont be seeing my gf any more... just before leaving we just hugged and that was it when she got overseas she did tell me she regret just hugging me as she wanted to do more...oh im from AUSTRALIA and she moved to THAILAND...

 

WHEN WE FIRST MET

 

We first met at my friends party and ... after that party i started talking alot to her and one of her friend who was also female... in her eye she saw that i was flirty with her friend and was all huggy with her friend and not her... yes dumb much? yes i am... anyways on my 18th birthday i got drunk and all i wanted was to be wtih my gf who im currently doing long distance with... after that we both became more and more closer

 

REASON FOR LEAVING

 

She was doing high school and during her final year of high school she was with me alot resulting to not studying alot... and being as young as i was ... i guess that would be normal as grades tend to drop when your in love... so when the finals came she got a poor result..... not being able to go to university therefore her parents told her to come back to THAILAND and do uni there as it is cheaper and would be better.... also shes been living in new zealand and australia for 5 years away from her parents ... so yea... right now i guess its my fault we're not together as i ruined her high school marks =[ ...

 

FIRST YEAR LONG DISTANCE 2007

 

SO that is the beginning... now its the long distance... she said i was good when she first i was on the internet every night we talk until 5am... ruined my sleeping habit... always sleeping in school work etc.. but i was fine with that i guess and she did the same thing aswells which is good for us as a relationship but isnt good in reality for our lives... i was so sad about her gone i started hanging out with her friends alot because she knew both of us would be lonely and sad about the situation,,, so in this case i started eating out going out to play pool every night with her friends as we hanged out more but i would STILL come home around 11pm and be online as we dont pool that late... from the first year long distance i started going to parties more meeting lots of new friends basically being more social... STILL talking to each other every night... but this was all new to me as i was a loser in high school the quite shy guy who would get buillied etcetc and my gf she was also the same too she was shy and quite... as time goes by... from meeting new people from parties froms alcohol it becomes almost impossible to get home early to come online to talk to my gf but first year i still managed to do this still keeping in contact with her.... i would web her every night and she would web me 1 time a week or something but that was fine with me i guess because its her choice and i know how insecure she is with her looks.... anyways i would sms her msn web cam and email each other all nighters alot and msn but one thing i didint do was call her... whereas she sms me callsme msn web cam and emails me aswells... on the first year we did suggest i come overseas but ive never been overseas before so i was like scared to get on a plane on my own and i wouldnt no what the first step was to BOOKING a flight so becuz of this fear i didnt end up seeing her in 2007 2008 and 2009 =[2007 first year being away on valentine day she sercretly went on a date with a guy and i found out becuz her friend told me and i talked about this wit her and then she never spoke to him again...ive never had anyone for valentineday... my first valentine is in 2010

 

SECOND YEAR LONG DISTANCE 2008

 

SO now we reach second year and things starts to develop and change... since ive been going out everyday it becomes a habit and i would club every weekend now so we are starting to be distance ... i gues that my fault as i choice to go out and club... we would talk every day still... but eg 1 hr before i leave to club my gf would ask me to stay and i would just leave her every time =[ and just vanish without smsing her at all during the night ... i guess that makes her worry and lonely as i have left her on the msn ...so then we argue fight etc.. but we end up being together still... wow i typed quite a bit and i still think its brief -.- o wells the second year i did not go to see her as again i wasnt knowledgable and was scared to travel on the plane alone...then when we're fine again we would argue again as i would repeatively go out... so she would always say i choose friends over her etcetc... now im mkaing her feel like somebody else not my gf... which i dont mean to do...the more time i club the more i drink the more i did this i more confident i get the more confident i get the more social i become.... then i finally meet a girl... but yet still being with my long distance gf

... i met this girl and i picked her up from the club and i got her number... no i didindt cheat all i did was got her number and that was it... then after i called her and we started talking... again i told my gf this she was aware but i know she wouldnt be happy about it..... then as time go by i ended the long distance relationship to be with this new girl... i broke up with her telling her that i dont ever see her coming back to AUSTRALIA anymore therefore i wanna break up ... and she couldnt do nothing and she tried so hard to change my mind but i didint she called sms cried on the fone web cam me everything...then my long distance gf tells me she on 2 years ANNIVERSITY she was going to come to AUSTRALIA come to my work place and surprise me... she told me the air line the booking number everything... but it was too late i already broke up with her... how stupid of me i know...she ended up canceling everything and she never did came to australia resulting to another year not seein gmy gf,,, with the girl from teh club we dated for 2 month then we broke it off.. and i got back wtih my gf from THAILAND by talking on msn and mobile... this was when i started calling her alot now andsmsing etc... she really loves me that why she choice to come back to me, yes i am aware the break up and me geting another gf is a big dark hole in our relationship... my long distance gf said she can never forget it but she justloves me too much and just wants to be with me...so now we're back where we were... we're talking to each other and we're good againstill occasionally going out but not as much as BEFORE as all i wanted was for me and my gf

 

BECAUSE OF THE BREAK UP... it killed her INSIDE.... she couldnt work study do ANYTHING AT ALL... all she did was try and get me back... it affected her study so much she had to CHANGE her uni course and therefore gradurate at a later date then expected... bcuz of me she does bad in uni

 

THIRD YEAR LONG DISTANCE 2009

 

This is the year my gf told me she fell in love with me on the first day when she first saw me enter the room... i also told her the same as it was true my eyes was on her the first day... After not going out clubbing for so long... on new yr 2009 i got really wasted in the clubb and im not 100% sure on this as i was drunk but it seems that i touched a random girl on the butt... resulting to getting bashed(bottled me from behind and hit me to the ground when i was walking to the car with friends) at the end of the night by 4 guys ...now im still talking to my gf every night before work afdter work etcetc... she didn't mind much about me touching a random girls *** that night because she understood i guess? that it was new yr and i was drunk... this year my long distance gf and i still havent seen each other as im still scared... shame on me yes..... and my gf she didn't come to AUSTRALIA as it is REALLY REALLY expensive for her...so now im slowing down on clubbing... but now im just going to alot of parties and bbq gatherings...... this old friend of mine i still friends with is like a BFF and we talk everyday same time i talk to my gf aswells.... then my gf bans me from talkings to her and i said ok i deleted her from msn and fb.... but becuz shes a good friend of mine i ended up making a new email new msn and new fb so i can still be in contact with her... my gf never found out thought until i was there with her in 2010... again this year i didint go see her because scared and she diditn come because money problem but in the third year i guess we were ok... the only problem was when i wen tout to bbq i wouldnt sms her.. ill only sms her when the night is over...

 

FOURTH YEAR LONG DISTANCE 2010 until PRESENT

 

I finally took a flight to THAILAND in FEB and left in March... we have been apart for so long so she told me she feels weird or awakward... with me i was normal i wa shappy and normal like 2006... it took 2 weeks for my gf to feels the same like she did in 2006... but even being together we still argued and still ended up staying a couple...so when we were togerther she found out about the second fake account i made for my bff so m y gf broke up with me we got together we talked she cried i cried and then she got back with me saying from seeing me cry she knew i loved her still...

 

While we were together... the hugging was less the kissing was less the holding hand was less... i wanted all this... but i had to understand her culture as she said bf gf shows nothing in public... but yeh i kinda felt less loved when i was there which is why i said 2006 was the best 3 month of my life ...

 

during the trip we were geting in each other nerve... fighting increasing... yelling increased.... then when shopping she tells me... you dont need me no more.. in 2006 i used to pick nice stuff out for u now you choose your own stuff which is good because its normal your a guy... dnno she said that... i went to her uni and slept there for 2 hrs as she had class.... sitting on bench and sleep is not as confortable as it looks -.-

 

on valentine day it was my first time having a valentine i asked her if she wanted to be my valentine etc... then i organised a sweet lollie jelly toy etcetc for her this was my first time doing something for valentine so i was excited=] but when i arrived back to australia she said vday was **** and what i did was **** "did u really think that was good enough"... ouch yes then she said she said that so I know how she feels EVERY TIME when i forget to tell her stuff when i mis treat her etcetc

 

On departure day... i was lining up for check in... i wanted her to be by my side because we will be separated again soon... but instead she tells me she will be over there... and i said no stay with me adn she leave.s.. so i checked in alone and then when i arrived back to AUSTRALIA she tells me she had to leave because she didn't want me to see her crying... im crying atm i miss her =[... again jsut before i went thur the gate to leave to the plane we hugged and that was it... just like in 2006...

 

From arrive back to australia my gf said that when i came back to australia i was good just like the first yr 2007... but then later she told me that i always keep her out fo the circle now... like i dont tell her everything ... when i tell her stuff it would be in beief now we're not ok as she doesnt feel part of my life as i dont tell her veyrething i only tell her brief stuff....

 

 

 

26th APRIL 5.44AM- We are now on a break as she said lets take a break from each other ...

 

Other information

 

since her departure i have not seen her since... i went to her country this year and we were together for 1 month ...

 

EVERY time i club i would let my gf overseas know what is happaning eg... if a girl came to me and try to dance with me i would let my gf no .. i dont hide nothing from her... and she told me she will be fine with it as long as i dont hide nothing from her and tell her everything

 

Every year my long distance gf would tell me she would come australia at least once a year... but she never did there fore thats how i kinda lost hope in her ever returning to australia...

 

Keep in mind in first year and second year i litterally told my gf EVERYTHING that happans to me EVERYDAY... like she would know whats going on whats happaning and feel like shes part of my life...

 

she choice to not club drink and be home for me everyday because she loved me that much... IF YOUR ALL WONDERING my gf doesnt club drink etc like me... soo while i was becomming more social and outgoing... she was there with me the whole time

 

i know ive done so many things to hurt my gf... shes suffered so much because of me...

 

Throught the whole relationsip there has been million of time my gf broken up with me!! but we always end up getting back together because we love each other... ive only broken up once which was when i got with that club girl

 

Yes we have talked about kids married life after uni moving in together... coutries to move in to and live tiogether with kids... and honeymoon we have talked about all this so i know our long distance can go along way

 

WITH THIS I WILL SLOWLY ADD STUFF IN ANY RANDOM SECOND eg... i might add more stuff in YEAR 1 long distance as i might have forgotten something...

 

OH AND I DONT KNOW WHY I TYPED ALL THIS I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHAT PEOPLE THINK...

 

 

 

thanks guys for reading please let me know what you think cheers

 

 

ok all the above i typed that in april... now its June 19

after being on a break it didn't really seem like a break as we were normal gf bf again as a long distance couple... when it came to my birthday she broke up with me ... it first started when she saw a photo of me with a girl i took on my birthday and from that we argued and i tried talking to her and everything and this was before she went to vietnam... so shes not going to vietnam yet and im trying to fix our relationship by talking to her and eveything then we didnt talk for 2-3 weeks and she went to vietnam... the silent of 2-3 week was i dnno because i dnno if we were over or if we were on a break but anywhos when she came back from vietnam she was 100% its over she thought it throught during her vietnam trip and she said we wont work ldr never work and she broke up wtiuh me... then i started talking to her trying to change her mind and she replies... u should of told me all that BEFORE i went to vietnam if u did we would be ok... but she said its too late whats done is done we're over everythign too late and we're over... then as days go by we still talking and shes like she refuses to go back with me adn she said if she comes back to me it will only be out of pity and guilt for me... and then when days go by she says she doesnt need me in her life its over she doesnt feel anything for me no more doesnt love me any more shes tired of us... and when days goes by she now says she hates me and says im annoying and says to f'ing leave her alone and says she doesnt need me shes fine with everything.... then she said that form her vietnam trip she has a good time and she said she doesnt want to be tied down from me anymore... and is aid that im not tieing her down she can travel go out meetnew people everything but she says no she doesnt want us no more ... then more days go by and she says she doesnt wanna marry or have kids no more everything we talked about is crap wont work and now......i dont understand how this feeling just went vanish out of no where... how what now=[... yes i know the end bit is breif becuz i have not SLEPT and its 5.40am atm... the story about the start and middle of relationship is detailed because i spent more time typing that up.... i know inside that deep in her she has feelings for me but shes fighting against our relationship i askedmy aunty she also said yeah shes trying really hard... but i dont know because the way my ex... talks to me she talk like shes fine and doesnt feel for meany more...she doesnt come on msn any more or check her email... she told me to lay low for now and thats it... hmms i will edit the ending better when i have time sorry if its all muddled up...

[leebarley]

Hey, thats a lot to digest.. several things raised as red flags for me. The picture taken with a girl on your bday is a no-no for me. As for her not visiting you to Aussie, do understand it might be really expensive with the currency exchange thing. The breaking up part, i feel she is burnt out and tired of being in a long distance relationship. The important thing about long distance relationship is to have a goal of when to end the long distance and be physically together from then on..

 

Just my 2 cents..

[asiandragon]

there was a goal a goal on when we finsihed uni and got full time jobs.... when she broke up wtih me she says she wanna study further now and work in other countries or something now but hte plan was being together next yr...