am i doing the right thing?

[hellohello1]

hi everyone. so its been 3 weeks since my bf of 2.5 years broke up wtih me..broke up becaues he was confused, knew if he was going to be wtih me it would be forever and he is not sure if that is what he wants (were both in our early-mid 20's). he had "cold feet", doesnt think he can get that "feeling" back. we often (he initiated) talking about getting married, having kids, everything. we want the same thigns in life, we have so many things in common and actually have fun together. towards the end we were just soooo busy with school and work that we never had time for each other, so then when we did have time it got boring and we did the same thing (watchin gtv, playing video games) and i think that made him lose the "spark"..towards the end i realized i was losing him so what did i do? i was clingy and controlling, which of course in retrospect was much worse.

 

i love him so bad. i am starting to better slowly, but im just so upset right now. anyway so today is day 8 of nc. i have not initiated contact in 8 days, however, we both work at the mall, and he came down to visit me on sunday, just said hi, said what was goign on with him, just spoke for a couple of min then told him i had to get back to work...i know he misses me, he was still wearing my necklace, i know he has feelings ther for me (he accidnetally blurted out i love you a week and a half ago)

 

this time apart has made me reflect on our relationship, and how i was subconciously destroying it..i dont want to be that clingy, needy person. i am not going to. when he met me he was sooo relentless to get me, i was "hard to get". i understand that i need to do NC. i just want it back so bad..please tell me NC is the right thing to do..i almost called him this morning. i honeslty feel if i had contacted him during that week he wouldnt have came down to visit me, there is no way he did not wonder what i have been up to because its sooo unlike me to just not contact him and act indifferent. i guess i just need to know that im doing the right thing by not contacting him..i really do think i needed a wake up call and this break up was certainly one..i just cant help but feel that he really is the love of my life..

[confused2010]

If you're meant to be then it will be. It's cliche but everything happens for a reason and we can't always see things clearly when it's happening but eventually it will be known. The important thing is to learn from your past.

 

I know you're hurting bad but NC is the BEST thing for you, especially right now. I wish I would have done it earlier.

[hellohello1]

thanks i appreciate it. i think logically i know it is, its so hard to not let my emotions take me over...

[confused2010]

I know it's extremely hard not to think with your heart, I do it ALL the time!! But sometimes we just have to force ourselves to do it bc our hearts don't always do what's best for us. That's when friends are good to have around, they can think much more logically because they are not involved.