Eclipse11 Posted May 16, 2010 Share Posted May 16, 2010 Hi everyone... I feel like the guilt I feel over my ex-boyfriend is making me feel like I can't move on... I'm looking good, going to the gym every day, meeting new people...I should feel really happy, but I don't, I spent all last night crying, thinking about his last words to me..."maybe someone will come along and break your f****** heart one day"... I didn't even do anything really...I didn't cheat or treat him badly...but throughout our relationship I stayed too long with him, I should have left at the beginning...he resented me because he felt as if he loved me more than I loved him ( because of this he also sometimes treated me horribly other times he was sweet, wish he had just been horrible all the time ) and it's true though I still loved him... After one year I did leave because I felt as if it would be cruel to stay with him wanting more than I did...I know it was actually the kindest thing to do... But every day I still feel bad...we have gone into no contact on a bad note, after saying what he said above, he sent two more nicer texts which I ignored, I didn't know what else I could do, I had tried being nice, it hadn't worked, it seemed to make everything worse... I just want to move on and feel like I'm not carrying this burden... I should feel delighted right now, we never went anywhere, I hated spending Sunday afternoons at his mum's house watching deal or no deal, made me feel about fifty years old, just wasn't me, I was miserable, he also acted as if I was worth nothing sometimes and I thought it was all my fault for not loving him enough...maybe this guilty feeling will fade, sure hoping so...part of it is, we've gone no contact so now I don't know how he is...been feeling guilty for one year now... Please can anybody help me feel better or something...thanks so much Eclipse x Link to comment
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