How to go about getting her back when we see each other everyday

[FTW]

Hi,

 

My girlfriend of 3 years and I have recently broken up, her reasoning being that it hasnt been a relationship for a while. We never went out together, we didnt have a sex life, most nights consisted of me playing online poker and her chatting online to her friends. The thing is in 2 years living together we never really went out anywhere because we couldnt reallly afford it, we spent most of our time online(sad lives i know lol, but we actually met in a chat room). So anyway getting back to the point, she wasnt happy with our relationship and me like a fool was just carrying on as normal not noticing anything wrong(besides the lack of sex). She says she still loves me but she doesnt feel anything for me anymore, whatever that means.

 

Now here is where it gets complicated, i want her back more than anything and i realise i should give her some space but the problem is i havent moved out! I have no family to live with, nor do i have any friends in the area so she has let me stay for now. We also have a baby son together which might be another reason she is letting me stay. So while i realise i should be giving her some space i cant really, other than sitting in another room which i have been doing in an evening after the baby is in bed.

 

So my question is, how can i possibly win her back when we are still seeing each other everyday? I figure if i can get the feelings back that she has lost for me there may still be hope but anything i try is going to be seen as an attempt to reconcile which i fear will make things worse. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

[misssmithviii]

Unfortunately, everything other than her saying she still loves you but doesn't feel anything for you anymore - led me to think perhaps this is salvageable.

 

However her saying that could just mean she's wondering where the spark went... I don't know for sure - but the lack of actually trying to make the relationship better as a COUPLE worries me because you must realize, NO MATTER WHAT YOU DO, if she's not willing - it's not going to work and you would need to start really striving to move out and make arrangements for your son.

 

I would say talk to her about how you feel and how you do want to try to make everything work. Take her out to dinner while you have someone else watch the baby, take her to a movie and start getting the "dates" back again... and of course, make love to the girl or at least hint at it ;]

 

Above all, get her to tell you how she feels and figure out what's going on between you two. If she tells you she truly has lost feelings for you no matter what... then it's time to move on, I'm sorry to say.

 

At this point, I'd say it's safe to give it a real effort and if she turns you down, you must accept and act accordingly.

[FTW]

I did try talking to her about how i feel but she didnt want to hear it. She kept telling me she didnt want to try again(This was the day after we broke up)but i wouldnt listen and just kept repeating 'why cant we try again' over and over. Thats when she told me she did still love me but didnt feel anything for me anymore. After that she just ignored me for days until i wrote her an email telling her i was listening to what she said i was just in denial and that i was sorry for letting things get so bad. Since she read that she has been civil with me.

 

I was actually thinking about the 'date' thing and trying to make those feelings that she lost resurface, but im scared to ask her in case she bluntly says no and i push her even further away. I want her back more than anything but i dont wanna rush it in case i make things worse, but then on the other hand i dont wanna leave it too long in case she gets with someone else.