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Is it okay dating two guys at once? How do I do this?

ImNotYourBabe

By ImNotYourBabe
in Dating Advice

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ImNotYourBabe Collaborator

ImNotYourBabe

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I signed up for an account on link removed to see if there are any guys out there that I might be interested in dating. I have been getting a lot of good feedback and I suspect that I will be dating a lot. I have a date this Friday night (just a meet up though for coffee to see if we click) and then I met some other guys that I am talking to also. So I didn't think that I would meet so many cool guys.... so how do I do this? Thanks for the advice. I'm new here as well so hello everyone.

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Jayauntae F. Rookie

Jayauntae F.

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Oh okay...well someone in this post said "make sure you are on the same page" or something so I was confused about that. I didn't think that was normal either. Thanks guys.

 

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never let them know your going on dates with other people

 

if a girl told me that i'd call her a who** and walk off the date......(not calling you that at all, just what i would say)

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ImNotYourBabe Collaborator

ImNotYourBabe

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?

never let them know your going on dates with other people

 

if a girl told me that i'd call her a who** and walk off the date......(not calling you that at all, just what i would say)

 

I did not plan on saying that I posted in response to the person above me who stated "As long as you guys are on the same page it is okay" I was just clarifying...okay?

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HeartGoesOn Grand Master

HeartGoesOn

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Hello

 

So I tell the guys that I'm dating others? Even on the first date?...seems kinda awkward right? lol

 

No, there is no reason to give out that information on a first date, since you barely know him. I would wait and see if there's any connection, and determine whether you want to continue dating him, first.

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ImNotYourBabe Collaborator

ImNotYourBabe

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No, there is no reason to give out that information on a first date, since you barely know him. I would wait and see if there's any connection, and determine whether you want to continue dating him, first.

 

Okay the reason why I was wondering is because I have never dated more than 1 guy at a time and was wondering if it was even okay at all...or if it was wrong. Obviously now I see its not wrong. Thanks you guys

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shuttlefish Explorer

shuttlefish

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A while back, I was on a first date with a woman I'd met an on-line dating service, things were going well and then she announced (rather patronizingly I thought) that she is also dating other men and that just because we are having a coffee doesn't mean we are in a relationship.

 

I was rather taken back by this (in no way was I assuming anything of the sort) and I replied that I too was dating other women (not exactly the truth, more like I would if I could find one type thing)

 

She didn't like this answer much and got a little frosty. On our second date, she was the one who wanted to be exclusive. I made some kind of comment about "what about those other guys?" and she said they weren't "cutting it".

 

She was quite concerned about losing me to one of the other women I was dating. I didn't bother to correct her. We then proceeded to have one of my standard 3 month long relationships culminating in a knock down, dragged out breakups that I seem to be so good at.

 

Oh the games we play!!!!!

 

Where was I going with this? Oh right, on a first date gleaned from an on-line dating service, why would anyone assume that you were NOT also dating other men. It's the whole point isn't it??

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shuttlefish Explorer

shuttlefish

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Yeah you're right. I HAVE ANOTHER QUESTION THOUGH LOL. So on the meetup do I pay for my own drink or whatever we do? How does that work? I'm used to guys paying for the first date but if this is just a meet up do I pay?

 

Assume the guy is paying but bring assorted cash change just in case. If the date goes south (one does meet some crazies out there) then it might be handy to dump near exact change on the table and walk out - you owing them nothing at that point.

 

I've always assumed I'm paying and often do. Most of the time, my first dates have been coffee dates so no big worries financially.

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Pnt8rshs Contributor

Pnt8rshs

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Hi,

 

I recently stopped the whole man-juggle. It was getting exhausting! But, I'm not opposed to starting again if the current "possible relationship" starts to wane rather than wax.

 

How I did it was:

If a guy asked (and only if he asked), I'd non-challantly and confidently say "you know, I'm dating, sure." And then I'd quickly have a filler sentence right after.

 

For instance:

 

"You know, I'm dating, sure. I don't like the dating scene really and I'd rather find a person that I really click with, but I think establishing a good friendship first is good too." And I'd smile at him.

 

And if you have something more to say.....to steer the conversation out of that arena, that would be even better.

 

For instance, ask him a question about himself that'll get him talkin' and thinkin' about something else. He now knows where you stand but that he is still in the running.

 

If he does not ask if you are seeing other people, he should assume if you are both on a dating site.

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