I don't think I'm capable of trusting men

[Leighton]

I'm 17 years old.. and my first serious relationship was nothing but awfulness, misery and abuse (ALL caused by me). I know there's things that my ex said that I did believe and took his word for, but then there's a lot of things I didn't.

 

I don't think I trust any guys. I'll look at a couple and say things to myself like "hm.. I wonder how many times he's cheated on her" or "that guy looks like a cheating jerk". It's awful I know. Even when I meet guys (that I like) I question everything they say. For guys who are just friends, I'm not as crazy. But I still don't think I have faith in them 100%.

 

I'm not sure why I'm like this. I have a terrible relationship with my father, who is the one man that when he says something.. I push it right out of my head because I don't believe a word that comes out of his mouth. He abused my mom and me physically and emotionally and he's very controlling and hateful. So when it comes to relationships.. that's all I know. I don't know what the meaning of a good relationship is... well I do.. but I can't seem to follow through to make my relationships like that. I make it all about jealousy, fights, hateful words, etc.

 

I really just want to be able to trust guys. Not question things they say and just put my faith in them. But I have no idea how. I try.. and I just fail every time.

[maverick554]

Well first you have to realize that everybody is different, and just because one guy cheated on you or abused your or whatever he did, it doesn't mean that every guy on earth is like that. But Trust me you will be able to trust again, the wounds from your recent relationship/break up are still very fresh and the pain will fade in time, and you will see things differently. I've been where you are before, had girls cheat on me and lie to me like crazy, but I have never thought that all girls were like that.

 

And what do you mean when you say "ALL caused by me?"

[atelis]

with respect, i think you are taking life far too seriously at 17 and you need to take a chill pill. Start living life and stop worrying about your next relationship and start developing some faith and trust in yourself first.

[skittles650]

at 17 focus on yourself. you don't need to be in a relationship. have fun =) you won't have to worry about any guy cheating on you when you don't have one. once you're secure with yourself, that's when you're ready for a relationship.

[jbrooklyn]

i think it is good you dont trust men. Men can be very deceptive. Most of the time....not all the time....but most of the time, they are the ones that cheat..get all distance...cant find themselves. all that jazz.

 

I dont think they are that trust worthy. They have that thing between their legs that has more power than their own brain alot of times. Look at all the stars and men around who cheat cheat and....CHEAT!!

 

You a smart girl. Dont trust a man too much. I would still have a relationship but men come and they go is my attitude now.

[Leighton]

I don't think I'm taking life too seriously at all.. but when my mistrust and insecurities affect my relationships, how will I ever be in a healthy one? It's not something to ignore, and I won't.

 

And my ex didn't cheat on me, or lie to me.. I just could never trust him.