Why is it so hard to accept that its over?

[jbrooklyn]

Has anyone struggled with getting over someone? It is like you just cant seem to make yourself give up.

 

I saw my ex at the club and we was nice to each other. He brought me a drink and danced a little. he went his way and I went mine. he called me when he left just to chit chat.

 

He has told me he doesnt want a relationship and I am finally not trying to change his mind even tho I still love him.

 

I want to be FRIENDS but i still want him as well. I dont want to force him to be with me or try to convince him to come back to me either. It is just weird.

 

How do I balance this relationship properly. I dont want to push him away but i dont want to purse him either. How do you do this?

[Stella Sleepwalks]

You need to get over him first, there is no other way to enter into anything platonic without putting your romantic feelings to rest.

 

You can't force that unfortunately, you just have to start embracing your single life and moving forward on your own.

[elite867]

Hi J,

 

I agree with Stella - you need to get over him. I am actually in the same situation. My BF and I also broke up but moved immediately into a friendship. It is very tough. We haven't really seen each other since the breakup but we talk on the phone almost every day.

 

It helps to move on. I am talking to other men and pursuing other relationships. Thinking of other men in a romantic way is helping me to move on and to be friends with him.

 

It is working for me, but it it doesn't take the sadness away. Only time can do that.

 

Keep your head up.

[jbrooklyn]

You need to get over him first, there is no other way to enter into anything platonic without putting your romantic feelings to rest.

 

You can't force that unfortunately, you just have to start embracing your single life and moving forward on your own.

 

I agree with this> Yes it makes sense. I needed you to say that to me. I will start there. thank you so much. I really believe this to be true.

[jbrooklyn]

Hi J,

 

I agree with Stella - you need to get over him. I am actually in the same situation. My BF and I also broke up but moved immediately into a friendship. It is very tough. We haven't really seen each other since the breakup but we talk on the phone almost every day.

 

It helps to move on. I am talking to other men and pursuing other relationships. Thinking of other men in a romantic way is helping me to move on and to be friends with him.

 

It is working for me, but it it doesn't take the sadness away. Only time can do that.

 

Keep your head up.

 

Okay, so it sounds like to me that you have given up hope of reconcilation. Is that right?

[Gnomex]

Breaking up as a couple is never something most of us want to happen. However, once it does occur, its best to consider it occurred for a reason. At this point, give your self time, and move on. I have found meeting new people a good way to bring myself into balance. and know you are your own person. relax and enjoy being single and know there will be someone new and special that is wating for you in the future.