Sick of feeling loney!

[OnMyWay]

Hello to everyone. I'm new here, figured this was the best way to kick things off.

 

Due to the economy, I had to get rid of my car earlier this year and that, combined with having a child on summer vacation, means I've been stuck at home for pretty much the past few months. I found myself not being able to see friends at all because by the time I would actually have access to a vehicle (5 PM+), they would be would settling down for dinner, family time, etc. I quickly found that my friendships rapidly died.

 

I turned to online friendships of which I have quite a few. There's at least 20, 30 people I talk to online on a regular basis. Lately, I found myself putting more into these friendships than I should - because I end up feeling as though I like them more than they like me. We'll chat online or skype, talk on the phone... then I won't hear from them for a week, and this hurts my feelings. I consider my online friends to be just as special to me as my "in real life friends", I just don't get to hang out with them in person... but I'm beginning to think that they don't view me in the same light. That's fine, they don't HAVE to... it just makes me sad. I know Skype is a bit to blame for that. Hearing people's voices just makes them feel "more real" to me. God forbid I hear that several of them are talking in a group chat and I didn't get invited. I get depressed and panic about "being replaced". It's so silly yet I can't get over feeling like that.

 

I just don't really know what to do. I just wish people valued my friendship the way that I value theirs and, even more, I wish I had a best friend. It reminds me of a clip from "The Bird Cage" that I heard once... Dianne Wiest's character said "Somebody has to like me best" and that's really how I feel.

 

Any suggestions on how I can change my outlook, or what I can do to change things? Thanks in advance. ♥

[arwen]

Do you live in a small town or bigger town? Sometimes it's easier to have some good neighbors than to rely on very active friendships with people who are not living nearby. I don't know if people really value you less than their other friends. A lot of this is your own perception- you feel isolated because of a major change in your life (having a child) and in addition you don't move around easily. How about meeting some mothers in your neighborhood?

[Xetra Dax]

I don't get it, are you married or not?

[OnMyWay]

Not quite sure why it matters. I'm looking for friends, not to date people.