I find that I'm not a fun guy to be around.

[CaseOfInsanity]

You know some people can just go on talking about funny stuff all day long. I'm not that kind of person. After general 'hi' and 'what have you been up to today' I run out of things to say.

 

I should go keep talking to people to get better but I find that I go back to my formerself and become quiet again after stop looking up funny TV Shows/jokes.

 

I'm kind of frustrated actually because I was like this since I was very young and I haven't try to change it until recently.

 

Got any advice on changing myself for good so I can actually have something interesting to talk about all the time?

[langford]

mingle with quieter serious types,or look for those who value those qualities e.g im an extroverted type but my best friend is quiet and introverted and I admire and like them specfically for that reason because he is a good listener,smart,honest,deep etc all qualities associated with people who are not zany,show offs,funny etc [like I am].As they say empty drums make the most noise.

[nutbrownhare]

Ask other people questions about themselves - I don't mean interrogate them, just let yourself get to know them. Many people having interesting things going on in their lives that they don't necessarily talk about in the first instance. If you are a quiet person, then you are probably a good listener - which is a very attractive characteristic. I used to know someone, a friend of my then partner, who was one of the easiest people to be around that I've ever met. What it boiled down to was that he'd listen carefully to what you'd been telling him, sum it up and nod appreciatively. You'd find yourself telling him things you'd never talked about to anyone before!

 

I was recently discussing this sort of thing with a friend of mine - neither of us 'does' shy, and we both came to the conclusion that when we meet someone, especially someone new, we want to find out if we've got anything in common, what makes this person tick, ... is this someone who's going to be a friend? In other words, we're so curious about the other person that there isn't any room to be shy or self-conscious.

 

Also, remember it's not just up to you to make conversation - but you can open things up to encourage other people, too! Forget about being a 'fun guy' if that's not in your nature; having a gentle sense of humour and being a good listener is just as attractive.

 

Good luck!

[i_love_chocolate]

Here is a tip that generally works and gets conversations going: keep up with what's happening around the world (avoid politics though). Say something like: did you see this crazy guy on the news who did this and that? It must be something interesting. That would normally start some interesting conversations and they lead to other topics and other interesting things. Try it but don't look like you're trying. Make it come as if it were natural and part of the conversation.

[Boom]

uhh...just try to be more natural. This coming from someone as inept at socializing as I. if I try to think of things to say like some kinda robot rolling through a list of questions, things get boring real fast and the convo dies with a whimper. I have to remind myself to be honest and open, but not belligerent or pestering.

 

Enjoy your next exp.

[easyguy]

There are some people who are shy to begin with but quickly open up, often in the same conversation. I feel it's important to stay genuine and true to yourself and not try anything prepared. Conversations don't flow as easily if you have some set of expectations in your mind. Pay attention to where you are, too. People usually go to places for a specific reason. Maybe there are some people who go to malls to meet people, but generally, they are there to shop, not to talk. Most people go to bars to drink and be in a socially open environment.

 

If you want to be a more interesting person and have more to say and share, and also have a deeper interest in someone else's life, become more involved in what you find interesting. Interesting people have done a lot. Staying up to date on current events is important, but I don't like the idea of doing it only with the intention of coming off as more interesting around people. Be up on the current events because you want to, not because you feel you have to.