Not sure what to do

[Avalon23199]

Talk about your confusing situations....

 

My boyfriend and I have been together almost 10 months now, and I've been pregnant for 8 of those months. The pregnancy was totally unplanned, but neither of us would change the decision we made to kep the baby. My situation is, as much as I find myself in love with my b/f, I feel like things could be much better. I keep feeling like hes hiding things from me. He's had personals up on the internet which I confronted him about and he told me he just hasn't removed them from when we met nd that the only reason he goes on them anymore is to delete any messages he has. The argument finally reached a head and he removed the profiles. Now, he talks to people on the net and if I'm around the computer monitor he won't bring up the message to answer it till I walk into another room or sit somewhere where I don't have a view of the screen. He's never done anything to break my trust in him, but I'm beginning to wonder.

 

I'm also beginning to question my love for him. I do love him a lot, but more and more each day I find myself fantasizing about not being with him, and the idea is becoming more and more tempting. Problem is, I cannot work due to pregancy complications and have no where to go if I did end things with him. Not to mention the baby. Im hurting here because I don't knw I can trust him. Any advice?

[SLBG]

Hi Avalon23199,

 

Sorry to hear about your problem.

 

It must be hard enough being pregnant let alone having trust issue with your boyfriend.

 

The only advice I can give is; if your boyfriend wants to be part of your life and loves you he should give up his life on the internet.

 

It's a big decision to have a child and has many responsibilities. If he can have child with you he must make a compromise and give up on the net.

 

He must make a choice, does he want to have a life and family with you or does he want a life online with his virtual friends.

 

Im not saying give him a major choice as we don't know enough about ur situation.

 

How old are you? How old is he?

 

Hope this helps

 

slbg

[woobiegirl]

You both may be feeling the "squeeze" of commitment by obligation rather than by choice. He may feel that playing on the internet provides some freedom/entertainment without really cheating. He may also feel pressured right now, as well as yourself, so the internet provides an "escape" so to speak. He doesn't feel as if he's doing anything wrong because he's home w/you.

 

Since you've both decided to have the baby, I would wait until the delivery to see if this wonderful experience changes both your outlook. If not, you are not married so you will still be able to make a decision of getting a job and moving out on your own. You always have a choice, just plan for it ahead of time and think things out. Do research yourself so you know what your options are should you decide staying is not your choice. Do you have any sisters, friends or family members to talk to?

 

Hang in there, you only have a short time to go and keep us posted on how you are doing.

 

Woobiegirl