Just Broke Up! Help! I Want A Friendship!

[babycarrot]

My boyfriend and I just broke up .... we had been together for 2 years.... my longest relationship. I really want to maintain a friendship with him... he was my best friend before the relationship and i want to keep as much of that as I can. Because he always been there for me.... and not only advice on that.... but advice to help my recovering process go quicker and less painful.... if there is any way that is possible.... since im having trouble eating, sleeping, working, or going to school... since all i do is cry

Please help!

[xoxlarixox]

hey...ok well the worst thing u can do in these situations is cry and not eat, if u want your relationship with him to be a frindship, act like if eveyrthing is TOTALLY fine, say hi to him when u see him , talk to hom abtu your life, what uve been doing at skool, your fmaily, i dunno ANYTHING just make him know that you still trust him with all your secrets, and ask him questions, to hint at him that your interested in his life and also so he know he can still trust you, if u dont see him, call him...and if ur too shy to do all this...theres really no cure for being shy, my one frase that i just love is "ALWAYS take risks" so you should!! and instdead of worrying about your ex, act normal towards him, and either get more friends or find yourself anotehr boy friend, if u have a best female friend rigth now would be the BEST time to spend time with her, or even with a sister, or your mom, a brother...somebody to be there for you, you should hav such a greta varity of friends, boys, girls, family...sooo many, so that in these situations u´ll have someone to talk to, and to not just rely on one person...ok hope i helped...oh and if u truly dont have anyone....or even if u do but u wnat to talk or ask soemone about ANYTHING, ill be here, so PM me or soemthing...i´d love to help you!

[S4il]

Take what has already been said into consideration, because i Couldn't of said it better than xoxlarixox Great Advice..

 

xoxlarixox You really know how to get that meaning out, I take it you have been in that same situation yourself?

[xoxlarixox]

no...amazingly i havent...but i really like giving advice, i try to put myself in otehr people´s shoes to really figure out what the bets thing to do is...c ya!! if u need advice pm me!

[babycarrot]

Thanks so much for the help!! I'm trying to stick close to all my friends... I know not eatting and well i cant help it if i have trouble sleeping does not help.... but im doing the best i can.

Do you think it is too soon to restart a friendship just after a couple days? He wants me to go to the movies with him and his friends and he wants me to talk to him on the phone.... he basically just wants everything like we were best friends again... but i worry that i wont be able to get over him if i hang out with him so soon, but i worry the opposite too....

I just want to get over it... be good friends again and just have a happy life

[Michael2]

Being friends is a BIG MISTAKE. You arent even over the guy yet, but you still think you should be friends? Not how it works. By maintaing contact, hanging out with him, you are only delaying the pain. I guarantee when you are together you wont be acting like friends, but like friends with benifits, which isnt a good idea . Trust me. Stop the games and heal.

[babycarrot]

Well actually we did end up hanging out but not alone... and we didnt act like friends with benefits at all... cos we both know whats goin on... it is just that we used to be best friends... and we want that back.

That's what I want... our friendship

[Hopingpraying]

Baby,

 

If you can truly do what you are saying then I say go for it, but what Michael2 is trying to say is that you are not over this guy. You are more then friends whether you or him know it or not. You just can't flick a switch and stop being lovers. You need to go through a greiving process and if you don't do that you will go through it eventually.

What will happen if you or him start dating other people? Will you both be okay with it? If he starts dating first and his new girlfriend doesn't like him talking to you, will you be able to deal with that? Most new girlfriends are automatically jealous of a previous one.

The benefit part is a real concern too, because both of you still have strong feelings for each other and you will use him to fill that void and he will use you. However, like I said before if you feel you are both strong enough not to do that then go for it, but if you can you are in the minority. I know I am not that strong.

 

Good luck.

 

Hoping & Praying for you!!