Very lonely...

[oliver78]

I'm 25, intelligent, friendly guy, but have no friends. I haven't had any close friends for many years now and am finding it impossible to make new friends. I've tried the internet for friendship and dating. Been trying that for years (yes, i'm very persistent!), but never had any luck. It is extremely rare that someone even replies to a message in the first place.

I've tried various social activities but everyone I've met is either too old or else wants to go off after to their own life.

 

I do quite well in business but it's no fun working 7 days a week. I work alone at home and enjoy my work on the whole, but I need a life and am at a really low ebb right now. I really don't know what to do...

[rich_1517]

I understand i used to be shy, i dont know if that is your thing or not.

 

here are some things i learned over time im 42

 

dont look for friends look to be a friend

put yourself out to help someone else

 

to be interesting be interested

 

do you smile? people like smiles

 

point out things about people that are positive

 

does this sound like you are out giving ego strokes, maybe but you are also getting them back over time. its hard to break out of being lonely and alone, the point is people dont respond well to will you be my friend?

 

its better when you are one and then they realized they want you around more

 

listen to peoples problems and joys, take time out to help someone else, two things happen you make a friend and you feel less lonely

 

once you start over time you wont realise how many friends you really have

[routerx]

First, your biggest problem is not seeing opportunity.

 

Even if you do something and you are surrounded by old people, they still can lead you to their younger sister, their daughter, etc.. Never think that a situation is a dead end.

 

I met my current girlfriend at a church outing with a bunch of a girls that I was not interested in. Well, a girl put in a good word for me and eventually I started dating this girl.

 

I can garuntee you a fix to your problem...

 

Join a co-ed team sport! There are SO many leagues, volleyball, bowling, chess, whatever!! Don't quit after a few weeks.. but gain a reputation and keep attending!!

[oliver78]

thanks for your support and advice guys I'm gonna try to get to know people more through writing music. Someone replied to my ad about forming a band. Rich, you're right about listening. It's one of my week points and something i need to work on.

[AN]

rich is cool