Advice Please....I'm a bit Confused

[Twixxie]

 

 

I have been chatting online with a guy for 10 mths now and we have been getting on great. We talk every day for several hours and like many of you have stated here, we can talk about anything and everything....It is sheer bliss and he has brought such joy into my life you wouldn't believe. Just ONE major stumbling block! I feel like I have fallen for him big time - perhaps that sounds crazy but we do seem to have 'clicked'. He appears to be such an intelligent and interesting guy and we share lots in common it would seem. I would love to take things further but I am rather shy.... I usually feel it is the guy who should do the chasing I have dropped a few jokey hints here & there about how I feel etc but so far, he hasn't made any moves. It is really getting to the stage now (for me especially) that I am asking myself how long we can go on just chatting online without making some effort to take things further? Last week for the first time in ages he stayed offline due to 'outside commitments' but I feel he may have been trying to take a breather from this whirlwind situation.

Do you think I am wasting my time with this guy - I really don't wanna lose him. But I don't wanna appear like a noose around his neck either. I think about him all of the time - Help!!

[amilasiu]

who does not risk does not drink champagne! IF you guys click so well, arrange a date for pete's sake! I am not sure how far apart you live, but saying something in line of "lets grab a beer after work" or "hey I have a ticket left over for a hockey game" or "i am having a small gettogether with some friends, wanna join?" will not sound as if your chasing him. It will show that you are interested, friendly, but not desperate or obsessed.

 

It will also allow you to see how interested he really is.

 

I definitely think you should pursue it. As long as it is safe, in any case it will be an adventure.

[Twixxie]

......Very much appreciated and so nice to get someone else's point of view. It's just that I find men so hard to fathom sometimes, hate to admit it - (but you know how it is, you guys?) For a start, I don't even know if he cares for me as much as I do him - Even if he does write me as often. And now since he has disappeared for a bit, I feel like I might have chased him away already

 

I suppose I shall just have to get over my shyness perhaps and ask him straight out. Corny as it sounds, he seems such a lovely guy and despite the fact I have other internet buddies (guys included), none of them do anything for me like he does. It really is strange and quite wonderful at the same time. Also goes to prove that one really CAN find love over the internet.

[applebee]

Just go for it as long as you like him. If I were you I dont care who chase who.

[Twixxie]

Yeah...I know, I was always brought up to believe that (rightly or wrongly) the guy should really make the first move. Strangely enough, it seems to work that way better for me in past relationships too. Whenever I have fancied a guy strongly and asked him out or dropped a hint etc, etc. he tends to run the other way I am not saying I am ugly either so that makes it more of a mystery. I am shy by nature however and often it takes a lot of courage for me to approach a guy I am attracted to. Often as not, I tend to take the bull by the horns after some initial pondering.... but as mentioned, unless the guy is of a like mind it hasn't worked for me in the past.

 

Thanks for listening anyway you guys. Your advice and support is awesome!@!

[applebee]

NO more hesitation do it.. Although I am kinda shy man.

And hope to hear good news from you.

[imdragonlady]

HI Twixxie,

 

Time to bring this relationship into Reality! Just state it that way to him and see if he is still interested. Any man would love to meet a woman if they connect like you both did online. However, if he is hesitant or give excuses, please be aware that he could either be married or in a relationship already. And it will also show you his actions regarding his priorities, hopefully you are one of his top priorities!

 

Good Luck!

[Chrysalis_77]

I met my bf on line 4 years ago. He's such a good person. We've talked for 3 years on the net and last year I had a good chance to meet him in real and lucky me, as he's as good as on the net !!!

 

Know what ...? I was the one who said "I think I am in love with you".

He's wise and said " it'd be better if we get to know each other"

 

Doesn't matter who says it 1st, if you feel connected, go for it !!! 8)