Question about a situation....

[adrummer]

Hey guys I have a question. One of my friends told me and my best friend, since we were both single, about his cousin that he wanted one of us to start talking to. She is very pretty and very nice.

 

Well the 3 of us are in a band together. She came to listen to us and told my friend that the drummer was very cute and she wouldnt mind going on a date with him. I'm the drummer by the way.

 

So my friend says he thinks he's gonna see if she'd like to go out. He wanted to go on a double date with this girl and my other friend and his wife. When my friend told his cousin, she asked if the guy that wanted to go out was the drummer, and they said no, and they said she was disappointed and wold rather go out with me. My friend has asked her on 2 dates and she hasn't went out with him yet. She doesn't respond much to his myspace posts, yet she responds to mine everytime.

 

I've been thinking about asking her on a date, but would that be wrong of me? I think my friend is halfway mad at me already about it, but I haven't said anything towards a date or whatever. Everyone else tells me that if the girl isn't interested in my friend, that I should just go on and ask her out and tell my friend she's just not interested. I'm just trying to be the good friend though. What should I do? Thanks!

[Dating Coach]

I've been thinking about asking her on a date, but would that be wrong of me? I think my friend is halfway mad at me already about it, but I haven't said anything towards a date or whatever. Everyone else tells me that if the girl isn't interested in my friend, that I should just go on and ask her out and tell my friend she's just not interested. I'm just trying to be the good friend though. What should I do? Thanks!

 

What should you do? Well yeesh! This is an open and shut case!

 

Your friend needs to get a grip. She isn't interested in him and it's not fair to you to stay away from a potential date because she won't date him. He's invested NOTHING in this other than his fragile emotions.

 

Ask her out on a date ASAP. Pick a specific date and time before you call her. Ask her out over the phone (unless you can do it in person). If you don't have her number, get it. If she asks why you need it, tell her straight up, "Because I want to call you to ask you out." Be bold, be strong, be self assured.

When you have her on the phone, keep the conversation short. Less than 5 minutes. Ask her out to the date you had already planned in your mind and tell her you'd like to pick her up at ________. Also, keep in mind a back up plan in case she says, "Oh shoot, I am busy that night." So you can say, "Oh, that's cool because I was going to _________ on the next night, you should come to that with me!" Be prepared.

 

If she is interested it will not be a chore to get her to come out. If she is making loads of excuses then she's not interested and you need to move on.

 

Good luck!

[onewithbooks]

I agree, its not your fault that she is not into your friend. She has shown him that, now its time to move on. you to her, and for him to someone else.