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Hand on Thigh - Conclusion


Imprecision

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The girl bought me lunch today. I found out she was eight years older than me.

 

Up until today morning, I imagined that her boyfriend was fake. But today, I realised that he was real. Furthermore, he was ten years older. They'd been going out for four years. Actually, the girl herself did not know how much older her boyfriend was. She only made an educated guess.

 

They'd been going out for four years, yet she didn't know his age? That was one mysterious dude. My heart sank as I heard the simple, quiet way in which she described her boyfriend. If he were an average frustrated chump - especially if he were the same age as her - then I would have no problem gradually excluding him. But this dude knew what he was doing. Even if I were ten times more flirtatious, even if my game were ten times more tight, even if I looked ten times sexier - I still could not compete with him.

 

So last Friday, the girl was just playing around with me. Very hard to accept - when I first saw the girl, she looked so unremarkable. She was just a slender, flat-chested Taiwan school-girl with an annoying habit of speaking too softly. (Btw, she looked like she was eighteen, even though she was twenty-eight.)

 

I underestimated her...

 

Or am I losing my sex appeal? Well, the upside is that she continues to buy me stuff. This is confusing...

 

I feel like that girl in I captured the castle where she thought the guy was in love with her, because he was always excessively nice to her, but in fact he was in love with someone else.

 

My mom suggests that the girl sees me as a younger brother. Well, I'd always had an elder sister complex. So this is perfect.

 

And besides, free stuff is free stuff. My expectations aren't high. I don't need gold jewellery or Mercedes. There is this hard-cover set of In Search of Lost Time I want. Plus, some new clothes might be nice.

 

If she can treat me to bubble-tea every now and then, I'll be satisfied.

 

Episode I here.

Episode II here.

 

Btw, Bijoux, I can't believe you are wrong this time. You were always right...

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Bijoux,

 

Do you mean I should read her by her actions and not her words?

 

Please elaborate! What is your interpretation of the entire story from last Friday up till now?

 

By the way, here's the prequel from before Friday

 

I first met her in class. I had never seen her before, so I told her to sit next to me. A classmate was hitting on her. The guy and I were on bad terms, so I started flirting with the girl, just to spite him a little.

 

When class finished, the girl asked me for my number and my email address. Normally, I don't give out my number - Girls keep numbers as trophies and never call you. However, I was indifferent to the girl - to be honest, I thought I was way out of her league (Yes, I try not to think in terms of leagues, but I do, and I'm my self-valuation is very high). Because I didn't care for the girl, I gave her my number carelessly.

 

That evening, our department held a small gathering. The girl kept trying to talk to me. She looked bored. She smiled whenever I spoke with her. I was slightly flattered - but then again I was used to girls fawning on me - besides, I had a mission that night: to flirt with the few women I designated as especially beautiful and worthy of my attention. So I mostly ignored her, except when I used her as a prop for discussing my fabulous life.

 

Unfortunately, I was way too excited (maybe it was the beer)? I went too far with my antics. She became annoyed and mad at the way I used her. So she left early.

 

Too bad, I thought - I wanted to leave with her, just so that I could have someone admire me on my way home.

 

The next week, I ignored her, and she ignored me. On that account, my classroom productivity tripled - since there was no other girl nearby to flirt with.

 

On Friday, I saw that she was drinking coffee. Reflexively, I asked her whether it was still warm. She said yes. Then I asked to have a sip. She laughed at me and said, "What kind of question is that?"

 

"Well if I had coffee, I would share it with you!"

 

"All right, if you want coffee that much, I'll buy you coffee."

 

I took up her offer. We had coffee in the library. And then we discussed the Blackie/Professor story. Usually, most women are shocked by the Blackie/Professor story (or any Blackie story for that matter). Women are easily excited by juicy gossip and sexual immorality.

 

But this girl did not bat an eye. When I was finished with the story, she simply said, "So?" I said, "What do you mean?"

 

"This kind of thing is common where I come from. Most women I know have both a boyfriend and a husband. The boyfriend for sex; the husband for money. Some, of course, like authority, so they go for the professor."

 

Her answer impressed me. So I told her to come home with me for lunch. Nevertheless, at the time I still thought myself way out of her league (at least in terms of real relationships).

 

When I got home, I thought, "My afternoon class is so boring. Maybe I should sleep with this girl instead."

 

I gave the girl some potato salad. All the while she was eating it, I thought of sex and stared at her. Then, I took her by the hand to my parents' room. I instructed her to sit on my parents' bed, "This bed has the best view of the garden. Sit down!"

 

But she ignored me and looked around the room. She saw my mom's picture and said, "Your mom is incredibly beautiful."

 

"I know, my grandmother used to be a HK cinema starlet."

 

Her observation pleased me. So I took her downstair to the couch. Then I said, "The garden looks good from the couch, too."

 

So we sat down. The rest of the story then begins at Episode I.

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You should be a writer, not a PUA in training. These stories sound like you're copying and pasting from a pdf file. lol!

 

Copy and paste?

 

Well, I tell people all the time that I am writer. Unpublished writer. Right now, I'm translating classical Chinese texts on divination into English. I think there's a big market for it. If I get some translation published, then I'll be much more confident about writing as a career path.

 

Did you like my story btw? Any comments?

 

I really want to hear Bijoux's views, though. Of all commentators in this forum, I respect her the most, not only because she is insightful and often dead-on, but also because she is tolerant and non-judgmental. Most women are cliquish and judgmental. Men, too - but in a different way. One reason I like older women is because they are so much more chill. Well Bijoux is my own age - so I'm impressed with her tolerance and open-mindedness.

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She is trying to act like she's cool, "different" and mysterious.

 

All girls are motivated by emotion when it comes to things like this. Yes some do play games but there is always an existing element of attraction. She liked being around you and so she asked for your number and followed you home and allowed you to touch her. Why do you think she "chose you" to play around with, and not some other guy? Because in your first meetings she could sense your character and was "interested" in it.

 

She sounds like the type of girl who is confident in herself and has good street smarts. However she is making 1 mistake: she thinks she can conceal herself by acting like a "man" (re: the things she said in Episode II), but she is a woman and my belief is that in almost ANY situation, our emotions are very important in guiding our actions. It's not a weakness, it's the truth whether we admit it or not.

 

I really want to hear Bijoux's views, though. Of all commentators in this forum, I respect her the most, not only because she is insightful and often dead-on, but also because she is tolerant and non-judgmental. Most women are cliquish and judgmental. Men, too - but in a different way. One reason I like older women is because they are so much more chill. Well Bijoux is my own age - so I'm impressed with her tolerance and open-mindedness.

 

Thanks for your comments I think I am judgemental though.

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Haha, yes, what you say makes sense.

 

I'll call the girl Flattie, for her flat chest.

 

When we were at lunch yesterday, Flattie started talking about her boyfriend. (Apparently he was strong and silent, whereas I was naturally flirtatious.) I changed the subject immediately. She knew this bothered me. I was so obvious - She read me like a book.

 

I felt disappointed - I felt as though we were playfighting, and she punched me too hard, but I smiled, even though she bruised me. I tried to be fun and flirtatious, but my heart wasn't in it. So I glanced around. I saw a girl sitting next to us. She was reading a book.

 

I told Flattie, "Look, I'll pick up that girl."

 

So I approached the girl with an opinion opener. Then, we talked about German philosophy for ten minutes. I got her number.

 

At first, Flattie looked at us with amused indifference. Then, she ignored us and returned to drinking coffee. She didn't bat an eye - I hoped she would resent me a little.

 

When I came back to our table, Flattie did not say a word about pick-up. I brought up the subject of pick-up a few times, but she ignored me and talked about Ibsen.

 

Then, we left the restaurant. As soon as we left, we ran into my PUA friend, Skyscraper. Skyscraper and I talked about picking up girls around campus. We ignored Flattie. She stood on one side carrying my coffee, my umbrella, and my books.

 

As we walked toward the library, I brought up the subject of pick-up. I asked her to critique my approach in the restaurant. Again, Flattie ignored me. She was silent the entire way until we reached the library.

 

At the time, I thought Flattie just didn't care. My antics were childish and immature in her eyes.

 

But Bijoux, now that I've read your explanations - I think maybe she too was bothered about it, in the same way I was bothered by her "boyfriend." Why else did she refuse to engage this topic?

 

I sure hope she was bothered.

 

I'm excited for class tomorrow morning, though. I'm looking forward to brush my shoulder against hers accidentally.

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The girl bought me lunch and coffee today. We've fallen into a schedule - She'll buy me lunch and coffee every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and whenever we go out on the weekends.

 

I've given up. She enjoys hanging out with me and flirting with me, but she has no plans beyond that.

 

I feel disappointed. But I'm okay - As you know, I have an elder sister complex. I really admire this girl. She's so brave and independent. So I don't mind hanging around her like her little puppy.

 

Today, Frizzie asked me why I insist that the girl buy me things. Well, when she buys me things, I feel that she likes me, at least a little. I know I sound foolish, but that's the way I feel about it.

 

So many good episodes, though:

 

1. When we were hanging out on Wednesday, she carried all my books, my coffee, and my umbrella for me. Unfortunately, she had trouble closing the umbrella, and so she dropped everything. She scrambled to pick up my stuff. The rain poured down. She was soaked. It was really funny.

 

2. She keeps doing stuff for me. For instance, we were getting coffee, but the line-up was very long. So she stood in line for twenty minutes to buy me coffee, while I sat on the couch reading a book. (She already had coffee, btw. She was getting it just for me.)

 

Bijoux, thank you for the advices, btw. If I were braver, maybe I would plough through and persist.

 

Sometimes you read a story. After a while, you forget about the story. Life happens. And then, suddenly, you think, "Hey, didn't that thing happen to me, exactly as it did in the story?" It's almost like make-believe.

 

Personally, I don't care for happy endings. I like women who don't take me seriously, who can play me and laugh at me a little. Maybe a girl who doesn't like me at first, but later on, just a little. I prayed for this, so I can't say life is unfair.

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Hahaha, I slept well last night. I am refreshed.

 

Now that I reread my last post - I sound like such a mixed-up kid!

 

The "mixed-up kid" persona has worked well for me in the past. But I must retire this persona. See, this is why I couldn't compete with her boyfriend - I'm too boyish, childlike, and talkative, whereas he is mature, masculine, and quiet.

 

Accordingly, I've developed a new story about what happened: She is paying for my company. If she doesn't want sex, then all the less work for me! (Now if I can get her to buy me that seven-volume set of Proust tomorrow...)

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