Will he come back?? Please advise!

[jayne]

Thank you for reading my post...

 

My ex and I are both business professionals in our late 20's.

 

Doug and I dated for 5 months. He seemed to always want to be with me, but did not have strong feelings for me.

 

We decided to date other people, and long story short, Doug and I decided to just be best friends. After about 2 months we started to see one another, kiss, and sleep together.

 

2 days ago I told Doug that I could not be friends with him anymore as I wanted more from a relationship. He said, "Are you sure you want to do this?" I told him that I felt like I desearved someone who loved me, had passion for me, and wanted to be with me. Enough is enough of the casual sex relationship. I does not make me feel good about myself and I can't be with you and move on with my life.

 

What I really want is for Doug to realize how important I was to him and for him to contact me. Do you think this will happen, or should I completely write off this relationship and keep dating the nice person who I have been seeing for about 2 months??

 

Thank you for replying...I need help!

[russia]

write it off. he's just using you as a sex object. and that's not good enough for you, although you have been offering sex to keep him. once there's no sex, you will see a big difference in him

[S4il]

hmmmm he did say "is this what you really want" that seems to me like he might want to commence something with you other than just "friends with benefits" that being a sexual friendship, you feel like you want more than just that, a relationship with someone you can love, and they love you the same, I see your point here...

 

I can't totally agree with what the other poster said, but it could be what he is thinking, he is all about "just sex" if that is what he wanted, Well than he got it... and that may very well be how he wanted it to stay, well you woke up, and i have to give you credit on that. so really you flipped the script, and now your putting him in a logjam...but it's for the good, now your going to see what his TRUE intentions are.. just be patient, if he wants you for love not just lust...I'm pretty sure he will be contacting you on that offer.

[russia]

i beg to differ. "are you sure you want to do this?" is most often said by men when they are threatened.

 

if he was truly in love with you, he'd be the one doing the moves on you, cos you are already having sex together.

[jayne]

Thank you for your replys! Do you think that he will be "out of sight out of mind." Or do you think that absense will make the heart grow faunder??

[spatzcolumbo]

Another question i am asking myself - its so easy to think 'out of sight out of mind' but i've been told that more often than not that isn't the case

[jayne]

This is true. I think I am going to do the no contact rule for a while and see how it goes. I know that he has feelings for me. I just want him to know it too! Does that may any sense???

[spatzcolumbo]

yeah that makes a whole lot of sense to me...just be prepared to find it very very hard to do the no contact thing without getting paranoid about stuff...i'm finding it near impossible!!

[jayne]

I am starting not to be able to sleep very well, and this is all that I think about! I need to be the strong, attractive, comfindent woman that i am in order to find peace in all this. Do you think I should call him and tell him that I want to be friends as long as we can not be sexual intimate with one another?