Binge drinking in adolescence

[ATLstudent]

I am so down, right now, my suicidal thoughts seem to be getting worse the deeper i dig. I have so many regrets from my youth, alcohol is the center of it all. I wish i had never touched the stuff personally. I got my first buzz when i was in 8th grade, and binge drank throughout high school, the last few summers of highschool i didnt go many days sober at all, just drank all the time, it was what we did, what we though was cool, and fun, and it was fun at the time, but i really regret. I've been reading up on the effects alcohol can have on the brain, when you binge drink during adolescence, its horrible, it can cause brain damage. Loss of personality, depression, all this stuff, i really can help but fantasize that i never drank growing up and i'd have a clean start right now, not true though, i feel alot of my personality and depression issues are very much so from the drinking i did. It sucks, so bad, i would do anything in the world to do it over again, AHHHH!!! I imagine myself if i had never drank, being more successful,more attractive, happier, full of life, AAHHHHHH!!! Im serioulsy regeret all of it, how do i move on, how do i reverse the damge, how do i find happiness, this is horrible, i want to die, its like god or whoever gave me a really good opportunity in life, looks talents, potential, and i pissed it all away,. I feel like I'm 60 right now alone, looking at his alcoholism and seeing all the damage its done, but im only 22 and i feel that way, now my life sucks, and i cant help to imagine what it would be like if i had never taken a drink.

[dream83]

How do you move on? Stop thinking about it and keep making serious efforts to do what you want to do with your life.

[PulsarSpin]

Are you still drinking today?

If not, you have made a huge step by recognizing the damage.

If you are, you have still taken a huge step forward in seeing what has happened.

Sober?

Y/N?

[ATLstudent]

Yes i am sober now, its just sucks having those moments when u want to do it over again in a different way