JTyler8705 Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 typical header right? I want to say right off the bat I would never pressure my girlfriend to do anything she isn't comfortable with, not that she could ever be pressured to do anything, but that isn't the point. I just turned 21 and I have been with my girlfriend for almost 3 years and we still haven't had sex. In the past we have fooled around, but never had actual intercourse, and most of the time, I was the one more into it. Because of that I've become extremely self conscious about my body, as she just doesn't seem interested in me, and we just had a serious talk about it recently, and she basically told me she has no desire to to have sex, is this possible? As I enter into my junior year of college I'm starting to freak out a little bit, I know it sounds stupid, but going into my 20s I was a little disappointed that I still hadn't had sex as a teen, and now that I'm starting to see my college career starting to end I don't want to miss out on the plentiful sexual opportunities that the college atmosphere provides. I know that sounds bad, but I don't really want to end up in a sexless marriage right off the bat, if thats truly what's in store for us...anyone have any advice, am I a total jerk for just wanting to experience sex? Link to comment
Krystal_Ivy Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 that sounds like me and my ex's relationship. We were together 3 years and never had sex. I just wanted to wait till marriage. whats her reason? he was understanding, but her having no desire is kinda weird, any problems in the relationship? have you physically changed? is she a sexual person at all? about college. You need to weigh out your reasons for being with her. If you talk to her genuinly and let her know you fear a sexless marriage she should open up. So basically you decide if you want some empty college relationip that is based on sex. Or work with your girlfriend and see whats the deal. Sex isn't everything in a relationship. Link to comment
JTyler8705 Posted June 24, 2008 Author Share Posted June 24, 2008 I haven't changed much...I'm about 150 and 5'11 when we talked about it she just said she isn't interested in sex at all. I know being a guy, its different for us, but I asked how she doesn't need any sexual release at all, and she said she didn't know...is it really possible to not desire to be physical at all? I now I sound like a horny jerk, but I just want her to want me...as lame as that sounds. Link to comment
Krystal_Ivy Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 no, that doesn't sound lame. There are SOME people that have no sexual desire, I think they're called "A sexual" but thats a disorder. Is she on anti-depressants? is she sexual at all? (porn, masturbation, get horny when you fool around?) Link to comment
JTyler8705 Posted June 24, 2008 Author Share Posted June 24, 2008 shes not on any meds that I know of...She's been horny when we've fooled around, but I always have to initiate everything, which makes me feel like she wouldn't do it if I didn't want to. I guess she really isn't ready for what we've even done so far, but she's my age...I just have a hard time believing that Link to comment
ShyKawaii89 Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 I agree with a lot of other people that have replied. I think the first thing you have to do is find out the reason that she doesn't want to have sex. If it's a matter of waiting until marriage or fixing some emotional problem then do that if you love her. If you don't love her or she just isn't as into you as you thought then I'd say it's time to explore other options. Hope that helps! Link to comment
Hayles Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 Finding that you are always initiating could mean she is self conscious? My friends and I always talk about sex etc. and you'd be surprised to find how different we all are - one never feels the urge unless she is aroused - and thereforeee unless her husband initiates it, she just doesn't think about it... Another is very sexually liberated and goes after what she wants... SHE is the only one who can tell you why, but you need to approach it carefully, so that she knows this is not just about sex as such, but about being able to be happy with her for the rest of your life... Link to comment
agent1607307371 Posted June 24, 2008 Share Posted June 24, 2008 Was she raised in a religious household? Any kind of abuse? Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.