a bad fetish of sorts?

[xioking39]

ok so there is this guy that i really really like alot. Well he has a very nice chest and all i can think about are his nipples. I know it sounds weird but they just keep popping up in my head lol is this a bad thing or just something im going through since i like him so much?

[Mlost]

Different strokes for different folks. If you like nipples, then you like nipples. And you like him, so you like his nipples.

 

Case closed.

[gardengnome]

mmmmm nipples. I think everybody has their fetishes to some degree or else we'd all be asexual.

[hers]

Everyone likes different things. I think it's perfectly fine. I myself have this weird thing for really nice jeans...they really get me going. Different strokes, man!

 

By the way, I'm from Pensacola!

[lukeb]

Technically it isn't even a fettish, nipples are part of the body and intrinsically sexual, so I really do not get your question.

[xioking39]

ok, im sorry that i may have used the wrong word. A better word would probably be obsession i guess. Its just when i think about him a pictures of his nipples pop up in my head and arrange themselves like the intro to the brady bunch. Its all i can think about. I just cant think about him as a person or a whole.

[lukeb]

Well you did say you really liked this guy a lot, I was assuming you liked him as a person. Do you like being around him in general? Do you like to also do nonsexual things with him? I guess sexually it is important to consider his needs as much as your needs, if there is enough common ground, you can accommodate each other and there really are no issues sexually. For me atleast, and maybe you are different good sex is a shared experience, other than that, I wouldn't place too many preconceptions on what that may be.

 

Since this is the gays and lesbians forum many of us grow up with very unhealthy attitutes around sex, so for some there is no real connection to the traditional "vanilla" types of sex. Sex often becomes something a little bit more harsh for it to work. Maybe for some if there are a lot of guilt issues around sex, the only sex that turns them on is the purely anonymous types of sex, one extreme is the glory hole. The person is reduced to a body part, the experience is reduced to simply an orgasm, you never get to even see your partner.

 

Maybe in some form this is what happening with your friend, simply reducing the experience to a body part. "I'm not having sex with him, I'm just playing with his nipples" The problem might be that you are not comfortable with the idea of having sex with him.

[xioking39]

Ok lukeb you seem to have gotten way off base. Ok so its this guy i like alot. he doesnt know it. We are good friends. We have spent many times awkwardly together but i just dont know if he is gay or bi and I have not told him how i feel about him. So I have seen him shirtless many a times but this image of his nipples just keep popping in my mind and i cant picture him as a whole.

[pianoguy]

I don't think it's much to worry about, especially since you aren't actually having sex. Once you start having a relationship, if it becomes a problem of "objectifying" or something, then you can work that out at that point.

 

We all have our fetishes, I think. I think it's pretty normal- nipples is pretty common. Relax.

[xioking39]

LOL Thanks pianoguy.

[lukeb]

Yeah now that we have more information I was somewhat off base. The issue isn't the fetish, but rather that you have feelings for your best friend. I dont think though I was far off with reducing your attraction to a single body part, makes it somehow seem less real more anonymous. Probably preserving in your mind the "friendship".