SamT Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Hi everyone, just a simple question really.. I have a thing with this girl right now.. Its a bit complicated, but she has admitted to me before that she does get bored of guys...(not sure what to make of that?!) but the point is..how do i make sure she doesnt get bored of me and eventually fades away? Keep my distance for a while? hmm :S a bit hard to do that? Mix it up? lol not sure what to do now to be honest. p.s. if it helps weve been talking since around Feb/March.. Link to comment
Lionel Hutz Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Sexually? Activity wise? Bored with your physical features? What type of bordem? I'd be kinda afraid and kinda interested at the same time in her constant need for stimulation. It can be a good thing or a bad thing. Link to comment
i_win Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Her comment of getting bored with guys is a huge red flag. She either ditches out on a relationship when the fun honeymoon stage ends and a relationship becomes actual work, she might use this as an excuse to swing from guy to guy, or she says this so that you go out of your way to keep her really entertained. I don't know...always having to stay on top of my game and feel pressured to entertain another person would really stress me out and seems like way too much trouble. I'm guessing deep down she is boring herself and is relying on her bf to keep life interesting - equally as bad. If you really want to give this a shot my advice is to not get attached to her emotionally first and foremost. Mixing things up, not being too available, and keeping things exciting for her might keep her around a bit. Link to comment
SamT Posted May 27, 2008 Author Share Posted May 27, 2008 Sexually? Activity wise? Bored with your physical features? What type of bordem? I'd be kinda afraid and kinda interested at the same time in her constant need for stimulation. It can be a good thing or a bad thing. Not sexually, or anything..just bored of talking/seeing eachother that kind of thing..we talk alot text wise so im not sure wether to hold back a bit to be honest.. yea i know what you mean, it could be a good thing but i wonder if it will eventually annoy me! saying that..its not just me constantly giving her attention or anything..vice versa too. Her comment of getting bored with guys is a huge red flag. She either ditches out on a relationship when the fun honeymoon stage ends and a relationship becomes actual work, she might use this as an excuse to swing from guy to guy, or she says this so that you go out of your way to keep her really entertained. I don't know...always having to stay on top of my game and feel pressured to entertain another person would really stress me out and seems like way too much trouble. I'm guessing deep down she is boring herself and is relying on her bf to keep life interesting - equally as bad. If you really want to give this a shot my advice is to not get attached to her emotionally first and foremost. Mixing things up, not being too available, and keeping things exciting for her might keep her around a bit. Yeah i see what you mean, i guess i can only see which one it is to be honest?! Im just going with the flow right now... I try not to get too attached to be honest..although it is hard not to reply if she texts me etc... Link to comment
Lionel Hutz Posted May 27, 2008 Share Posted May 27, 2008 Id find someone else. Thats a precursor to bordem and cheating later down the line. I'd bail. Link to comment
zboi13 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 Not sexually, or anything..just bored of talking/seeing eachother that kind of thing..we talk alot text wise so im not sure wether to hold back a bit to be honest.. yea i know what you mean, it could be a good thing but i wonder if it will eventually annoy me! saying that..its not just me constantly giving her attention or anything..vice versa too. Yeah i see what you mean, i guess i can only see which one it is to be honest?! Im just going with the flow right now... I try not to get too attached to be honest..although it is hard not to reply if she texts me etc... i think that you should sit down and talk to her about what she wants and then tell her what you can do. but before you do that, try to be spontantious and do something with her that she wont expect. Link to comment
leafshockey_81 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 don't write her off right away .. it depends how well she can control her boredom. EVERYONE will get bored in a relationship, spending everyday together, or getting married will take a toll on anyone. it just depends how she handles it. those 'boredom' phases will come and go.. anyone with experience will know that. however some people can't handle it well, and as some people have already said will be a headache to deal with. the fact that shes honest and upfront with you might be a good thing, just don't take offense when she wants her own space from time to time. respecting that may take your relationship a long way. Link to comment
zboi13 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 don't write her off right away .. it depends how well she can control her boredom. EVERYONE will get bored in a relationship, spending everyday together, or getting married will take a toll on anyone. it just depends how she handles it. those 'boredom' phases will come and go.. anyone with experience will know that. however some people can't handle it well, and as some people have already said will be a headache to deal with. the fact that shes honest and upfront with you might be a good thing, just don't take offense when she wants her own space from time to time. respecting that may take your relationship a long way. i agree to an extent because a boredom phase could break it totally if you dont pay attention to whats really going on. deal with any doubts that proceed with care, sensitivity and care. take it easy too. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 i've heard plenty of girls say they get bored with guys. more than likely, they have dated boring guys. just be fun and flirty and show who you are. she will either like you or not. maybe you will sense SHE is in fact the boring one. Link to comment
drewciouS281 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 like ghost says, be fun and flirty and dont be smothering. No matter how long your with someone you still have to play alittle hard to get. Dont be at her beckoning call. Link to comment
boo121 Posted May 28, 2008 Share Posted May 28, 2008 be un predictable. a good one is to ring her up and say "hey, what are you doing right now?" if she isnt busy, invite her out. Link to comment
Caterina Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 Well either she gets bored or she doesn't. But one thing that always helps is not being overly available. Set up dates like a man but don't call her every day etc if ya know what I mean. Link to comment
zboi13 Posted May 29, 2008 Share Posted May 29, 2008 be un predictable. a good one is to ring her up and say "hey, what are you doing right now?" if she isnt busy, invite her out. be FUNpredictable!!](*,) Link to comment
SamT Posted May 30, 2008 Author Share Posted May 30, 2008 Yeah i get wat your all saying. Thanks! I try not to look needy and such, but i do see her quite often..hmm Fun and Flirty seems the way forward then! Im pretty sure i could keep things fun and excited if i dated her..just hope she can aswell!? Link to comment
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