archlighting Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 He hinted at the breakup that it was because he needed/wanted more freedom, wanted to party, drink, and sleep with women. So why, if that is what he wants is he not doing it? As per his away messages on AIM, he is still in bed everyday at 10, not going out on weekends, and spending his evenings doing the same thing he did when he was with me: playing computer/video games with friends, watching sports games, etc. This hurts because its makes me feel like.. more than him wanting to be single.. maybe it was me. I just want to scream this hurts so much. Ok, going to write my goodbye/closure letter. Just had to write again. The mornings are still unbearable and when I wake up writing here seems to help me get my day started. Link to comment
Litgirl01 Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 ((((hugs)))) Sorry you are hurting! Link to comment
Snoopy24 Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 I know it's really hard not to check up on our ex when we break up. But trust me. Stop looking. It is only going make things harder for you.. Get the book, "It's called a breakup because it's broken" It should help you out a lot. I know how bad a broken heart hurts. It's one of the worst feelings in the world. Get the book, and post hear as often as you like, and you WILL get through it! (((hugs)) Link to comment
Litgirl01 Posted April 30, 2008 Share Posted April 30, 2008 I know it's really hard not to check up on our ex when we break up. But trust me. Stop looking. It is only going make things harder for you.. Get the book, "It's called a breakup because it's broken" It should help you out a lot. I know how bad a broken heart hurts. It's one of the worst feelings in the world. Get the book, and post hear as often as you like, and you WILL get through it! (((hugs)) I love that book!!! I have worn it out! You have to make the brownie recipe from the book!!! Those WILL make you feel better! Link to comment
archlighting Posted April 30, 2008 Author Share Posted April 30, 2008 I read this book/got it on tape to listen to on my commute. They had some very good points, which I wrote down so I could reflect on often. The problem for me was they stressed what Im guessing for many people are common problems: calling him/showing up, eating junk food, drinking, calling in to work, etc. For me, these arent the issues Im having. Almost the opposite. Neither of us have contacted each other, Im hardly eating, but forcing myself to have some healthy food when necessary, not drinking, getting out every day, not calling into work, etc. I guess I do have exhibit the problem with contacting in that I am still looking at his away messages. *sigh* It is just so hard to stop. I know its hurting me, but it feels like its the only connection I have left to him, however anonymous it is. I know Im just setting myself up, but.. *shrugs* I just feel like I'm not ready to completely lose him. Does that make sense? I know its over, but I'm still in love and when I can see at least this little part of him I feel like some connection is still there. Also, he only signs on/puts up away messages for me to read. He has almost no one on his list, and Im the only one active. So.. I don't know what purpose that serves either, but, this is the one piece left and Im hanging on to it and don't know how to stop. Link to comment
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