Anxiety causing problems with sex

[Firefly]

Hi guys and girls,

 

I'm just looking for some advice or support from anyone who has been through this.

 

I'm suffering from premature ejaulation and sometimes struggling to keep an erection.

 

Basically, during foreplay I lose my erection and when we are ready to have full sex I can't get it back up again. I don;t think this is a problem of my girlfriend not being good enough.

 

Also, if we skip foreplay so that the problem doesn't happen, then i tend to come too quickly. This is not a stimulation thing. It is definitely mental as i often feel no pleaseure at all but come because of anxiety.

 

I believe neither of these problems are physical. They are definatley mental and based on anxiety, in particular performance anxiety.

 

Has anyone been through this that can offer advice? What is the best way to deal with this in my mind? How do I help myself relax? Where do I start in overcoming this?

 

Any advice or support is much appreciated.

[knightNshiningarmor]

first talk to your girl...let her know its not her and that its you and "that its just going to be a little time before i can really get comfortable" hopefully she is patient...btw i had issues with this before and one thing that kinda helped get over the hump was having us masturbate together...it was actually kinda hot...a little different but i think that helped us or me rather...like knowing that was ok..she really helped facilitate and i dont think i could have like suggested the idea it would have come off weird...pun not intended lol..but it just happened to work in the moment. But honestly beyond that i think just talking to her and learning what makes each other tick...and realize shes having a good time cause i think thats were most anxiety stems from is whether or not we stack up.

[srssatellite]

Best advice I could give is to learn to control your own ejaculations. Practice this with masturbation, but as for your erection, you just got to relax. I suggest not worrying about intercourse until you can overcome it, so have a talk with your girl and just have some fun doing other sexual things.

[ghost69]

try strokin it before you hang out with her. then you will be trying really hard to finish. hehe.