Sad

[kevinm]

Arrgh. I'm so sad... been a week since my g/f and I decided to take some time off. It's so hard. Despite being busy with work and other stuff, I'm just down in the dumps. Wish I could reach out and hold her, tell her how much I still love and care for her. I know a big part of it is just loneliness... it's so tough, being alone. It's not that I'm lost without her or need her... I just plain miss her. I wish she would contact me

 

-Kevin

[SnoopyLove]

Why don't you contact her?

[kevinm]

Well... I've thought about it frankly. I don't know. Just want to give her space. Don't want to fall into repeating the same path we were on... being distant pen pals and part time lovers. I want something more serious, but perhaps I'm asking too much. It's all very confusing.

 

-Kevin

[Brittney2008]

Has she contacted you since you wrote her that letter expressing your feelings?

 

I know from previous posts of yours that your not much for NC for various reasons, but it really is a true test of feelings. You've put yourself out there to her and let your feelings be known, now the balls in her court.

[kevinm]

Well, I wrote two letters... both pretty much said the same thing, the second was basically for clarification on the first. I didn't want there to be any misinterpretations about how I'm feeling. In short, her wanting to see other people hurt me deeply. Yet at the same time she wanted me to be there for her and continue dating me. It made me feel like I was an ace up her sleeve, plan "b" or whatever. I don't want to see other people.

 

To answer your question, yes, she has responded, but not to the content of my letter. She has responded basically saying that she got them, and will write back, but is really busy doing other things. I wrote back very quickly thanking her for writing back, and then telling her she has all the time she wants... which she does. But I feel now that she's straining our already tenuous relationship by waiting to respond. Maybe she is busy, or still sorting out her feelings, that's fine. But at some point I would like to think she'll respond. It's just killing me that she has not, hence a large degree of my sadness.

 

-Kevin

[Brittney2008]

I don't care how busy someone says they are they can find time to send a quick email or text.

 

I've been kinda in your situation before so stuff like this frustrates me. Why can't people just be upfront about their feelings? Why keep people waiting by the phone or computer?

 

I believe that 99% of the time people know what they want but they don't know how to break it to the other person so they keep on stretching it out and saying they need time until the other person finally gets fed up.

 

Don't wait around too long.

[kevinm]

Thanks Brittney

 

I won't wait too long. Just feeling down right now. But... I'm off to a fundraiser now for breast cancer awareness and PBR (pro bull riding), lol. A little whiskey tango for my taste, but what the heck, right?

 

-Kevin