Girl w/ my friend won't stop flirting w/ me

[Sure Shot]

This girl I really like is going out with a friend of mine. She really doesnt do much with him and always flirts with me so terribly. She referred to me as hers, spooned with me on my bed, had a two hour conversation w/ me at night in my car, and will lay all over me. She does this all the time if my friend isnt around w/ anyone else around or just the two of us. She told me she was unhappy w/ the two of them together but has been more into him more as of late, I think. She will stare into my eyes and I just want to reach over and kiss her but I don't know if that is the right thing to do since she is with this guy.

This guy just doesn't know what he is doing in any sort of relationship and had said terrible things about her before they got together that she doesnt know about. Just accept that the guy doesnt know what he is doing and is kind of an idiot. If anyone would like specifics, ask, but they aren't completely necessary to understand what is going on.

I'm really unsure if this girl is just doing her thing or seriously likes me. Should I let her cheat on my friend if that is what she wants to do? Should I tell her how I feel or ask her what she feels? Is she just playing with me? Would it be wrong if I just kissed her? There have been a lot of times when I can see in her that she seems to really want me to, but I don't. Should I ask why she keeps doing this stuff w/ me? Any other advice would be extremely helpful.

[The Morrigan]

It sounds like you need to talk to her, a nice chat and ask her if she's unhappy in her relationship, and if she's really interested in you, or seeking from you what she's not getting from her bf. If you just go ahead and start trying to kiss her and take things farther while she's in her current relationship, you're going to end up wondering just what she's doing, why she's staying with him, how she sees you, and wonder what she's doing when she's not with you. It's very hard to trust someone, even if they leave a relationship for you, if you start anything while they're still involved in that relationship.

 

You also need to ask yourself if you like this girl enough to pursue a relationship with her, or if you're more enjoying the attention she's giving you without being attached to you. Think about what you'd like, find out what she's thinking, and work from there - but regardless of how good a bf this guy is, he's still your friend, and getting involved with his girl while she's still his, behind his back, could cost you his friendship, and any chance at a decent relationship with this girl.

[Gilgamesh]

This is very simple.

 

Do not get involved in their relationship.

 

Do not advise or instigate anything in order to break her up.

 

If you really have hopes of being with her someday, do not flirt back or allow her to have what she wants now, get it?

 

If she starts flirting again, just tell her, listen I don't want you to take this wrong, but, i cant do this, its not right, "so and so" is my friend and i don't want to betray him. if you weren't attached then yes.

 

This will do many things:

 

A) If she is just playing games (power, trying to make her BF jealous) then she will stop, because she just found out its not working, and you don't get egg on your face, and lose your friend.

 

B) If she really is having problems with your friend, and is interested in you, she knows she cant have you unless she has left her B/F.

 

C) By doing it it this way, it wont look like your betraying your friend, it also make it look to her that your a loyal person, and even have self discipline and control. (not easily seduced).

 

you see, there is only 3 outcomes to this.

 

1) She keeps flirting with you until he finds out they fight, she ends up with you, but it don't last long, and you lose your friend. look like a back stabber, and she really wont respect you.

 

2) She is just playing with you, (girls do this a lot believe me) and she may or may not leave him, and even if she does, she wont have anything to do with you.

 

3) Or you can do like I said, If she wants you, she will leave him for you, and you don't need betray anyone.

 

Take the smart path, stop following the advise of your little head, and start thinking with the one on your shoulders.

 

One word of warning,, this girl is the kind that, flirts behind her boyfriends back, thats WHO she is, and thats what she will still be if she is with you, don't think for some reason that she will become a different person because your so special, beware what you ask for, because you might get it. if she can do it to him, she can do it to you. period. you have been warned!

[Cid]

Gilgamesh is right dont try to brake them up. But talk to her and tell her that it is buging you and yowould not like her to do that when she is in an realtionship. I think she will under stand.

[Sure Shot]

Ok, I am just going to let her know whats up she tries anything again and if she really wants me then she is going to have to come get me.

Thanks for all your help.