Coworkers...

[jshbrn]

I've been in a good, serious relationship with a co-worker for about 4 months now. Everything as far as work goes has been great, we've handled being around each other a lot more than other couples very well, there are no issues there.

 

Lately, she has been feeling unfulliflled with the job, and has been thinking of going back to school or pursuing a different career. I have been completely supportive of it, want what is best for her, and even think that us not working together would actually be good for a relationship.

 

I'm in a position at this job where I know a lot of what goes on around the office, and recently found out that she would be getting let go soon (she doesnt know - and I cannot say anything to her or risk losing my job). Since I have found this out, it has been very hard for me to act like everything is fine. So she thinks I am mad at her or unhappy with the relationship, and I cant tell her what is really bothering me.

 

When we are talking about her career plans, I've just been trying to push her onto other things (which I think is best for her anyways). I dont know what is going to happen if this actually goes through, should I tell her I knew? and then will she be mad I still work for a place that fired her?

 

I always heard that it wasnt a good idea to get involved with someone you work with, but I didnt think it would be for a reason like this. We've handled the other part very well. :splat:

[lana111]

i have been dating a guy from work for a while and, like you said, its peachy. we can totally separate our work time from our personal time. we are awesome ahahah.

 

this is quite a dilema.

 

if i was you, i would have to pretend like i didnt know. i wouldnt ever want to risk my job and id hope my bf would understand.

 

if i was your gf, i would want to know. i would know that i could keep that confidential information that i shouldnt know a secret. i would know that i could pretend liek i knew nothing.

 

i know its a contradiction... sorry.

 

if i really truly trusted that my bf wouldnt let the cat out of the bag. id tell him. i would say "listen, you need to pursue this idea of going back to school or a new career bc i have information that leads me to believe you wont have a job at work soon". then we would pinky swear and do it ahahahah.

[DN]

When she is told will she know that you have known all along?

[lana111]

When she is told will she know that you have known all along?

 

good question dn

[jshbrn]

When she is told will she know that you have known all along?

 

Very highly unlikely.

[Censored]

It depends on what you value in life, and what some of your own values are:

 

For me, I would tell her. I do not believe that work/career should come before, family and friends or lovers.

 

 

You should tell her of this situation. I would consider it absolutely unforgivable if i was in her position and then found out that my SO knew all along.

 

For me it really is a no brainer.

[Censored]

When she is told will she know that you have known all along?

 

Hmmmm, i am suspicious of where this one is leading

 

I believe deceit is deceit whether she finds out or not that you knew all along.

[DN]

For me, I would tell her. I do not believe that work/career should come before, family and friends or lovers.

 

I agree with this. Are you sure telling her would jeopardise your job? How would they know you told her or that she left the job because she was going to be let go?

[jshbrn]

I'd rather not take that risk. I was told by accident by someone that didnt know me and her had a thing, otherwise I wasnt supposed to find out.

[MushroomGod]

I'd tell her. If it was me I'd want to know.

[Jen5283]

I think you should tell her since it's effecting your relationship with her. It's not your fault that somebody spilled the beans.