The one that got away - soulmate - letting go

[eltee]

Does any one have a story in which they let the love of their life go because of bad timing... Do you still talk to them? Have they ever come back?

 

Is this really true: If you let them go and they come back, it was meant to be?

 

Help me let go. I still think of the one man I ever really loved (it was just recent) but the timing was all wrong... or is it an ache in the heart that will always remain there?

[Knctrnl22]

I know what it feels like I guess the one that I let go of found someone else now and I am out of the picture.

 

I still have coffee and dinner with her and I guess I should feel that I am fortunate but I don't.

 

You want to know if it will ever heal

 

The answer that I have is that it will only heal if you are true to yourself.

 

I know that it just didn't work out and that I have to go on with my life.

 

I also have hope that maybe someday it will work out.

 

It has been something really hard for me to deal with and I can imagine it has been the same for you.

 

The healing will start when you decide that you want to get on with your life. The healing will happen gradually over time mostly

 

What I tell myself is that things like this happen and you have to get up!

[ChildeRoland]

The one I let go also found someone else; married them in fact. I was devestated by the news when it was given to me by a friend.

 

It took me a while to get over it, but get over it I did. It takes a fair bit of time; in my case this was a first love, but the reason we broke up was simply that we had different priorities in life.

 

You have to be honest with yourself and be sure that what you want in life is the same as your partner. If not, then you have to either compromise or follow your own goals - don't sell yourself short. Eventually you will find someone with the same ideals and goals as yourself.

 

Assess your own goals and concentrate on what you need. Self-esteem and confidence are an attractive trait in any individual and, as I am still learning, stem from the fact that they are happy with their life.

 

I know what it's like to think what might have been. You never know, things might work out with your ex; but YOU should be the priority in your own life.

 

Take care and keep well...

[HeartBrkn]

It's been four years since my girlfriend left. We went out for eight years. I just found out she is getting married. I guess she's not coming back. I feel so pathetic. We saw each other once after the breakup and I just couldn't see or talk to her again. The only thing that makes it bearable is that she is 3000 miles away. That's the reason we broke up. I really need to move on.

[mahlina]

I'm really sorry to hear about your break-up! I know exactly how you feel.

 

I've let someone go b/c of wrong timing. I just wanted to get my education and career straight before I settled down. I wanted to find myself. I dated my ex for 4 years. Periodically, we would break up here and there.

 

Then, I really broke it off with him. I really felt bad. I still do! It hurts to let someone that you love go. I still love him, but only as a friend.

 

We don't talk anymore. But, to answer your question, if they love you, then they will come back: At least for me, for the both of us did do that. I came back, but the feelings were not the same.

 

Honestly, I think that if you are meant to be, then things will fall in place. Your breakup is traumatizing. However, you will become a stronger person having had this experience.

 

Healing from a break up will take quite some time. Things will work out for you. I really thought that I could not live w/o him, but I survived. So will you! There's still hope!

[LightsDimming]

I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you. I can relate.

 

I had to let go somebody last year and it was a case of bad timing. I feel that she was my soulmate, and I was for her.

 

It took a long time to get over the extremely strong feelings we had for each other. Even after she had made her decision, there were many times that she 2nd guessed it. It was extremely difficult for both us of to let go.

 

In the end I had to let her go. Break all contact for it was too hard. I felt that nobody could ever compare to her. It took awhile before I started to feel better. A good 6-12 months went by before I finally felt good about seeing other people.

 

I still talk to her on icq once a week and see her maybe once every couple months. When we see each other now, all the feelings come back in an instant, but it doesnt hurt any more. We are great friends and I am glad we still are. I know that she still feels the same way about things. It comforts me even till today.

 

Time heals the pain you are feeling. There really isn't much you can do about it. I truly feel for you.

 

Is it meant to be with my soulmate? What is strange is that my current gf has just asked for time, time away from me, she says she isn't ready for a relationship with me right now (this is why I am on this forum). I just found out that my soulmate was just having conversations with her boyfriend about whether they should still be together. Maybe things happen for a reason. Maybe she will come back. I dont know...I but I have hope.

 

Good luck to you.

[eltee]

Thanks for everyone's contribution to this topic. It meant a lot to me. I think basically, relationships... good and bad, are meant to be lived for a reason. The harder ones just take longer to heal, but eventually make you a stronger person. I know what I need to do is move on, because my particular situation is messy. I should just have faith in fate and the paths we all lead for a particular reason. I'll let it ride out... it's just hard sometimes when you're alone... because your mind wanders and can destroy you.

[CobbsWoman]

Wondering if you ever worked this out. It's been just over 4 years now for me and not a day goes by that I don't think about him. Your situation was very similar to mine so I thought I would ask you for that reason.

[Capricorn3]

Wondering if you ever worked this out. It's been just over 4 years now for me and not a day goes by that I don't think about him. Your situation was very similar to mine so I thought I would ask you for that reason.

I doubt the OP will be able to answer your question as she hasn't been back on ENA for 8 years (thread is 10 years old). Closed.