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Which to choose?


jaded4life
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Unfortunately love is not the picture book romance.

Adversities are common. Someone we think we love

may never feel the same, an emotion of love can soon turn to pain.

Rejection, fear, intimacy are all possibilities, we risk, no guarantees.

The man that use to make me laugh is responsible for the bitterness here, yet I miss him just the same. He knows that he was wrong, states he will always have a love for me. What makes this man tell me this, could it be the shame? I guess this is how the betrayor feels, while the victims feel the blame. Never should have trusted you, forgave you too many times.

Regret ever allowing you to enter my soul and mind. You know that you have broken me, do you realize what you did? I tried so hard to love you dear, for I know your heart was in pain. I guess we both used each other to forever forget the pain of loving the loves we had before, to give our hearts the chance to try again, but now I am left with more pain!

All the nights we shared the talks, all the love we made, how could you leave me here and give your love to someone new. How could you know I hurt and say you love me too? What I felt you did not deserve, a love so pure and true.

But just as you broke my heart, this new woman will discover the same.

For what you will find in her, will be the memories of me. And every time we now look at each other the memories will bleed, for you bitter heart turned to another when love should have brought you home to me.

I gave you the chance know me, revealed a bit of my love, scared to accept what you feel then, now you say it was love.

You have no right to now ask me how I feel, I can see the sorrow in your eyes, but what I want more than life, would hurt my foolish pride. Perhaps I should show up on your doorstep like the way I used to do when I decided love is more than pride for me to choose. Do you remember the time I did that last? The night I walked in the snow to run to you to get there fast, afraid that you were hurting! You welcomed me with open arms and that night our love grew! But just as all the distant past that night now a painful memory, but the lesson here that I have learned is to now think of me. Jaded, sad, alone and depressed I search for a new love to take away my painful past just as you. But when I woke this morning I found myself dreaming of you, we were making love you so sweet it all seemed to be true. I woke with a gasp, a tear, and a smile, yes I may love you forever and always feel this pain. As for now I must turn my back on love

and never speak your name. Secretly we may yearn for another scared to face the results. Foolish pride may prevent for us the future of a greater love, but foolish pride will make me remember how bad it is to love. So if you are wandering what to do, let me go? or hold on? you should know that while I want to run to you again, I must hold on to something more.............my foolish pride within.

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wow, i thought that was amazing, to define something so true and hurtful to you in such words as that was enlightening. i found it very moving on the contrast of emotions and the willingness to continue.

true love will always stay with you and when something attempts in going it also takes a part with it.

you will love again but it will just take the time to fill the whole from before and then continue to develop.

great words.

kel

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