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love or need?


charlotte_skye
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Hi,

I was wondering if nayone could help me with insight into this topic.....

how do you tell the difference betwee love and just loving someone cos u need them....?

 

im so confused, my ex mark and i are still best friends, the thing is we broke up when i went overseas ( i broke up with him) and now im back 4 mnths later we still hang out every day and chill but just as friends, i admit i still have soft spot for him, i miss u sbeing close.

thing is he was so secure, he wa sone fo those guys who wouldnt let u down and play games etc and i needed that after my last bf b4 him.

anyways ive been in love b4 with a guy named luke and it was so different to love with mark and thats kinda why i broke it off with mark when i went overseas, because i wasnt 100 percent sure how i felt about him and he was fallin for me already.

thing is when i was overseas i missed him but it wasnt killin me but i knew if i gave it the chance with mark i could fall in love with him, that brings me to now and the past cpl mnths ive been home from overseas....we spend all time together like best friends and all my friends have moved into city for uni etc and so i have no other friends here in my home town anymores so i only have mark.

I care bout this guy soooooo much no doubt but i know hes moved on after i hurt him when i broke up with him and he may be starting to see someone new soon and i just feel soooooo awful......i feel so devestated that i have lost my best friend , what am i oging to do? i have noone else and i do EVERYTHING with mark, im the most special and closest person to him and he is to me. when we were together he was SO in love with me and we were so close and i loved bein needed and focused on, and im just confused that maybe thats what im upset about loosing( him needin me etc).

also i do care about him so much and we are so close so its not like i just need SOMEONE if that was the case, its more like i need someone who im close to who needs me and whos so focused on me etc and wont leave me and my best friend, so thats mark, but is that what it is or am i actually in love?

the thing is i dont knwo if what i feel is a broken heart and thta i have falen in love with him the past cpl mnths now ive got my head together etc and settled here at home or if i just feel so hurt because i need someone, i dont have anyone and no life at mo and ill be loosin my best friend if he goes out with her.

so how do u knwo when you are in love or if you just feel you love them cos u need them?????

i so need to know , im so confused.

ive been thinking back to times lately where ive gone over and just hung out with him and its not like im htinking omg i love him, i just feel happy were close but i hated the thought of him needing someone else or seeing someone else and not needing me.

i keep crying when i think we wont be able to hang out liek we have in past since the day i met him.....am i in love or just needy? how do i tell? pls help me.

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The question I guess, is do you love him becasue you need him, or need him because you love him? Love is love. These sorts of problems are all over this site. But if he makes you happy, and you feel comfortable around him, then do something. Do you need him? If there is no need for him- then the attraction is largley emotonal- in which case I say you have to approach him. If there is a reason why you should need him other than your emotions, than consider how significant that is. In my opinion. It does not matter whether you love him or need him, because if you can offer him what he needs at this stage of his life- and he the same for you, then getting together seems the best option.

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