I'm sleeping with my ex! What's happening?

[beagle]

I wrote a while ago to say that my longterm relationship was falling apart (not my choice). My girlfriend had said that she just didn't feel the attraction anymore and wanted more independence. She also said she had feelings for this other guy. Well after everything including counselling I had to concede that we should break up just so that we could salvage our friendship. We are really close and I could never be without her friendship at least although I wanted more.

 

Well, recently we went to the US for two weeks. I had booked this because I thought that it could really help to have fun and start enjoying life together again - even when we broke up I insisted that we go if only as travel companions. We had a fab time - halfway through we found ourselves in the shower together and kissed but she freaked out and I thought that even our friendship was lost. She made the first move by the way - I wouldn't have dared jeopardise our friendship.

 

The last couple of days in San Francisco were perfect - we had the best time and oddly sexual tension was just racking up. On the last night (and morning) we just gave in and had the best sex. Since we've gotten back we can't seem to let "San Francisco" go and have barely been able to keep our hands off each other. It's so weird. She now admits that she is still attracted me but says she would still like to experience more independence. Since we've been away, it also turns out that the "other guy" royally stabbed her in the back and has turned out to be a real jerk.

 

I don't know what it all means - I love her loads and it seems that a certain amount of spark has returned but does it mean that I should try again with her or should I give her more independence and we should stay separated for longer? Help!

[heyou]

Hey beagle....Heres what I would do personally. I would never let her know that she has the upper hand or the key to your heart so to say. At least not right now. I don't know...women are a WONDERFUL strange breed! It seems that they want to be wanted, but once they are, they need to have a little fire in their life. If you want this woman, you have to give her that fire and not let her know that she can just have you at her whim. Now I'm not saying be mean or a jerk to her, just don't let her know that you're so easy. You have options, so make sure she knows this. And give her every option to be as independent as she wants. I think you'll find she'll love you more for it. Just my opinion though! hope it helps! PEACE!!