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im gay but dont know if i should tell my parents yet

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im 14 and i am 100% sure that im gay.

I am very nervouse of what im going to tell my parents and how they will react.

I have a very good friend {who i dont have feelings for}and am considering telling him first as i think that he could possibly help me and keep it to himself.

I think that deep down my friends know im gay but wont say anything in case they might offend me.

can you help me?

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Hey There!


Well, it is up to you if you want to tell your friends or your parents that you are gay. It's not easy. I have a lot of friends that are gay or les. And it was hard for them.


They tell me, it is easier to tell their friends than their parents. Their friends freak at first and then realize, hey, they are still them and will not hit on me, so it's okay.


Parents are a bit trickier i am told. They go in denial about it, thinking it's just a phase...but with most of my friends it is not. They are who they are, and i support them.


Parents see it as a deformity of sorts. So try giving hints to your family and see how they take it, they may be open minded. But do tell your friends, your friends will be there...and on some level i am sure they know you are gay.


I hope this helps!


Take care!

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I think that most of us know what our sexuality is by this age. When we fantacize about sex, we think of men or women; I believe that he is sure about himself at the age of 14.


Telling others about it is a different story. If you are very close with either of your parents, I feel that they should be the first to know. That way they can tell you how to go about making things public, you know what I mean?


If you first tell a friend, then they may tell others and it may get back to the parents eventually, sooner than you'd like. And that will make your parents more upset than if you spoke to one of then first.


It is like anyother family issue, it is dealt with in the family. Now if they are the type of parents to disown you or beat you for this, then don't tell them until you move out. Infact, my feeling is that this type of information is for you and you alone until you are 18 or 21, when ever you plan on moving. If you tell a parent, and they start to really over react, you could say something like, sorry mom, I guess I have some more growing up to do. Don't mention it again for a while.


You may ask to seek counseling or spiritual guidence before making this sort of move too. It is a complicated issue, that needs to be handled in tiny portions!

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  • 2 years later...

Hi im 13 and im pretty sure im gay. yes the age is a tid low but hey. i have been thinking about it for awhile now and im pretty sure im gay. but what makes me alittle earritated is when people say that ur too young to know if ur gay or not. i think its all about being mature or not.


Also i have been trying to tell me sister (because im way more closer to her then my parents) that im gay. well when my mom finds out i really hope she doesent think that its just just a phase and that she support feelings

and if she doesent i will ask her. what when im 30 are u still going to be calling it just a phase or believe me. so that is why i believe that im not to young. ty

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im 16 and im bi. i have been told repeatedly that its a phase imgoing through. i know its not a phase cos ive had these feelings since i was about 6. i am sexually attracted to both men and women.

i havent told my mum because she has a problem with people being gay.

i find it so hard not being able to talk to anyone about my sexuality!

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