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Sex Drive: NONE... HELP


mel_o_dell
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We've known each other for about ten years. We finally made our relationship official about 5 months ago. I have no problem what so ever with waiting until we are both ready for it, it been a long time for both of us. But thats not the problem... I brought the situation up one night and he said that he really just doesn't have much of a sex drive. We were about to one night, and then funny little things kept happening and it kinda ruined the mood, although it was a lot of fun... but we haven't even tried since then. I thought it was me, but he told me it wasn't at all... that its just very spontaneous, and sometimes he gets sexual urges at work or in the middle of the night when I am not around. I am definitely at the point where I am ready and have been for awhile, but its so difficult to bring up or even try because I don't really know how he is feeling about the whole situation and he doesn't really like to talk about it, i think hes embarrassed about it... is there anything I can do or say? should i just sit patiently and wait for him to have one of these spontaneous moments when I am actually there, or should i just have a night where i do everything in my power to try and get him in the mood (which i have tried and doesn't work too well). what do i do?!?!?!?!?!

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2 possibilities i can think off

 

one - he's not excited about you. 10 years is a long time, are you sure he doesn't have something going on, on the side? maybe it's in the past, but he may be hung up about it. guilt thing. whatever.

 

two - he has a real psychological/physical problem. is his work schedule too exhausting? or is he intimidated by you? or his function is failing?

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