jojo720

I am afraid that I am going crazy. I went home sick yesterday b/c I seriously was sick to my stomach. I did confront him when he came home and told him exactly what I saw. He told me exactly what he had told me the night before (when he was drinking) about where he had been and all that. I told him that I saw him drive to the back of the bar and said that he never parks there. He said that there wasn't any room to park in the front, which could be true. I couldn't tell from the house. When I confronted him on dropping her off and both leaving the parking lot at the same time, he said that he drove past the bar b/c he has to pass it when he comes home (which is true). He also asked me why I would think he would ever cheat on me b/c he has no reason to ever do that. If for some awful reason he ever did cheat, he said why in the world would I cheat on you with someone from the same town we live in where everyone knows us and everyone is a gossip. I believe what he says, but I am still skeptical. I explained that I don't want him calling her again and he can talk to her at the bar--in public and if she calls here, he can take the call with me in the room. He did explain again that he is depressed b/c of all the stress with remodeling the house and his job. I guess i feel better b/c even tho he was drunk Wed nite when he came home, everything he told me is the exact same thing he told me last nite. I also confronted him about the underwear in his truck and he laughed and said that he was working on the tractor and needed to wipe the dipstick off and ran into the house and that was the first he grabbed b/c the laundry basket was sitting by the door. When I first confronted him he said why don't we have my parents come over and your parents and we can tell them everything--insinuating that I tell my mom everything, which is not totally true b/c she knows nothing about this anyways--and I told him I don't want to involve them. Then he mentioned something about counseling. I later said that maybe I need to look into counseling myself b/c I don't like feeling this way and he took it all wrong and thought I was saying he was a bad hubby. So, after all of this, everything is ok. I hope. He knows how I feel so I guess I will take it day by day. Thank you to all of you for your advice. I wish you all the best of luck in your lives and pray to god I never have to deal with this again.

Well, as I suspected, he was with her last night. I saw him drive down to the bar (I can see it from our bedroom window) and sit there for like 2 seconds and then take off again. My best friend and I drove down the bar and her car was sitting there. We waited for them to come back but decided to leave at like 11:30. I watched from my bedroom window at 12 and saw him pull in the parking lot, sit there for a few min and then watched her drive off and him come home. I confronted him when he came home and of course, he denied that he was with her. He said he went to the bar for a shot and then left to go to another bar. I am sick to my stomach. I wish I was dead. I don't want to deal with this. I can't stand to be at work today. I'm going to tell him tonite that I want the truth and if I don't get the truth, I'm leaving. It's very hard for me to do b/c he is the love of my life, my whole world, my everything. And I am deathly afraid of losing everything.

No, no new clothes/gifts. I don't have to worry about lunch b/c he only gets 1/2 hour and it takes 15 min to get to the town where we live from where he works (we work in the same town). He also works with her brother in law. I've been watching the phone calls like a hawk. We'll see how tonite goes. Thanks for the support shari. I'll let you know how it goes.

Ya know, those are the same ideas I had. That's kinda scary. I've smelled his clothes, I can't smell any perfume. However, the really big thing is I was in his truck and found a pair of his UNDERWEAR in his consul. Yes, I did smell them, I didn't notice anything. I didn't say anything. I thought I'd wait until after tonite and check tomorrow to see if there's another pair. I don't know why in the world he would have done that. I think tomorrow I will just happen to say Oh, I found the strangest thing in your truck....and see what he says. I think I'll be staking out the bar tonite. I'm trying to think who I could have go in there for me. Luckily, I have the cell in my possession and I pay all the bills. Thank you for your support. In a way, its comforting that a complete stranger has the same advice as my best friends!!

Thanks. I don't want to say I put limits on him, but he does know what his limits are. He has been cheated on by ex's which were long term relationships. He knows how much that hurts. He always says how "no other woman ever let me go out with my friends." I thought I was doing good by letting him go out. I told him I've been in her sit in my past relationship and I know what she wants--if he doesn't make a move, she will. My gut has always been right and that's what scares the hell out of me. Would it be bad just to drive past the bar he's going to tonite to see if he's really there? It's not that big of a town and if I know he's there, it would make me feel better b/c there are so many people that know we're married. I wish I could stop thinking about this.

Hello. I am having quite a problem. My hubby and I have been married for just over 1 year and have been together for 4. We are remodeling a house, which makes him stressed. However, a few weeks ago, totally unlike him, he went out 3 nights in one week and I was not invited one single night. I know men need their nights away, but 3 nights out was a little too much for me to handle. Anyways, there is this woman who has been out everytime he is out. She is married to a drunk, so she says and uses my husbands shoulder to cry on, so he says. Anyways, she called our house, he spoke to her and then tried to claim it was the wrong number. I found out it really was her number and confronted him calmly about it. He blew up about how I don't trust him. I explained, as I have told him before, I trust him, just some other women I don't trust, especially when their in a bad relationship and he is a caring guy. Anyways, I busted him last week for calling her. He called to make sure she was ok b/c she was traveling to another state. I told him that's what her husband is for, not MINE. So, another fight ensued. I work for a law firm and he said "just draw up the papers" during the fight. He had said that he would move out and that we should just get divorced. That is the LAST thing I want. We calmly talked and I explained again how I didn't like the fact that he was talking to this woman. He claimed he has been unhappy and brought up a lot of things not even related to our marriage or us having problems. That night, after talking, everything was ok and still is. Except I feel sick to my stomach b/c he is going out again tonite and I know she'll be there. I have never given him a reason to cheat. I do whatever he wants me to do, let him do what he wants within reason and let him have whatever. My question is, WHAT DO I DO???? I explained she doesn't need to call a married man, she has a sis who is divorced or could talk to her best friend. NOT MY HUSBAND Somebody please help me.