drucillaangelus

No, I refuse to leave my home. Beyond being my home, its close to my place of business, to school and apartments are hard to come by. She isn't expected to stay at her current apartment longer than a month 2 at the maximum, and I certainly won't be intimidated. She chose to come back to the apartment. She wants this problem to disappear (me along with it) and I just can't do that. While I am willing to be sympathetic and understanding, this is my life too, and I'm not willing to give up things that mean something to me simply to make her comfortable. It is one thing to be empathetic to someone elses pain, and another entirely to uproot your own life in the name of someone else's personal insecurities and issues. I am willing to do all I can in the current situation, but moving away is simply out of the question. Dru

i wrote a while back looking for advice re: telling my ex that I was dating already, very soon after the breakup. It went well, and we remain friends, though he needs his space and time and I can respect that. His main concern being whether there was any physical contact involved prior to our breakup. He had mostly become apathetic about our relationship and that question was more about pride and ego than any major affection concern. I've come to realize we have very different opinions on how to love someone. ..however...my new boyfriends ex, who lives in the apartment underneath me, is taking things a little less calmly. I'm almost starting to become afraid of what she might do. She attacked him the night he broke up with her, and while there haven't been any incidents, I am getting a little antsy about my physical safety. I don't want to feel like a b**ch for being at my own home with my new boyfriend, and we try to remain out of sight as much as possible. It is a fairly complicated situation, as the building we live in is an old converted house, and we are all more like friends and roomates than neighbors. We all share a big backyard etc. I am sympathetic to what she is going through, though I can't deal with the anxiety and the temper-tantrums. I am 29 years old, and have no desire to behave like I am in junior high school, though it appears that that is what this is turning into. I'd like to prevent that but I don't know how. I would like to approach her, but her sheer hatred for me is obvious, and I don't know that it would come off as anything more than condescending. To make matters worse, her constant stories about me to her and her exes (my new) boyfriends former friends is now causing tension between my boyfriend and HIS friends. Does anyone have any advice at all? Thanks Dru

Hi, I just joined and I have a rather sensitive ex issue. I recently broke up with my live in boyfriend of 6 years. The reasons were varied, but mostly I was just un-happy and I think the breakup was a long time coming. Anyway, I am dating a really cool guy, unfortunately, he happens to be our downstairs neighbor whom we both knew and were friendly with. To complicate matters, this neighbor broke up with his girlfriend 3 days before I broke up with Tim, under her accusation that he was obsessed with me. 10 days later, that's right its only been 10 days, I have to tell my ex of 6 years that I am dating someone else. That he knows. That he hung out with. There is a pretty intense connection between the new-guy and myself, and most of our friends had been aware of it from the beginning, but that wasn't the reason either of us decided to end our respective relationships, though knowing there was the possibility of greater happiness definitely made it easier. Now, my breakup was friendly and we still talk, and since my birthday party is coming up next week (to which I plan to bring new guy) I am going for a drink with him (on Saturday) to discuss this whole situation as delicately and sympathetically as possible. I don't think it does him any good to be the only one left out of the loop (as all our friends are aware of the new-guy situation) and I don't think its fair to new-guy to put him in a position where he has to fake it and pretend that his feelings don't exist. In short, I need to clean up this mess as quickly and painlessly as possible. Does anyone have ANY advice at all-how I should approach him, what I should say? what to expect? That I am crazy and insane? Thanks to all Dru