foolsrushin

Day 6 After finally falling asleep, I woke up a short time later in tears and have not stopped crying since. This is a horrible place to be and I sympathyze with every person here. I really don't see how this will ever get better. I try to see myself with someone new, but the thought just gives me a sick feeling in my stomach. I don't know what to do to make it feel better. I try to go out, but when I do, I feel like I'm a drag to the people around me and that I would rather be anywhere else. I feel claustrophobic and leave, but the next place that I go to feels the same. No matter where I am or what I do, I feel the same. People say keep yourself busy, but it just isn't working out. I am lost in the devastation and feelings of despair. I just keep telling myself to think positively, but to me, that means thinking about when we'll be back together... the whole thing's demented.

Day 2 I am at work obsessing about him. I can imaging this is how hell really is. You get to experience happiness to the fullest and then it gets taken away. The low seems so much lower because you were so high... and it hurts, and this hurt resonates because you are so empty inside. I'm trying to express myself, but in doing so, I find that the devastation that has engulfed me cannot be explained. Will I ever find myself again? Sorry about my ramblings. Just need a place to vent...

I too think about my ex every moment of the day. I need to stop because my work is suffering. I have not done anything in a week. My boss is understanding right now, but it'll get old quick. I need to get my act together, but I don't know how. Thanks again for being there. I feel that we are in the same place in this process and though I don't wish this on anyone, it makes me feel better knowing that I am not going through this alone.

Icyness, Thank you for the nice thoughts. Breaking up does seem to lower self esteem to the complete bottom. I know I am a great person, good looking and have everything going for me, but that doesn't matter. Break ups make you wonder how anyone could let those things go... I guess someone's love shoots your self esteem to the limits and once gone, you wonder how you managed to do it before. God, I need some help This hurts like hell, physically and emotionally. I want to throw up.

Day 1 I just broke up with my ex on Sunday, after learning that he had made out with someone else. I am devastated to say the least. How can someone who says he's in love with you be interested in someone else? This person works with him, so I feel like with me out of the picture, they are already dating and having a fabulous time. How can 6 years of a relationship be over just like that? Not 2 weeks ago, we were talking about where to get married, price, rings, etc. This is the first guy I have ever trusted in my life and this had to happen. I don't see myself trusting again. We had been going through a tough financial situation. We both own houses that are worth way less today than when we bought them. I had told him that we could give one up and concentrate our efforts on one. He said no because he didn't want to just give up. I should have known then that he had commitment issues. I wanted to keep his house because we had completely gutted it, and I had decorated it inside and out, according to my tastes and our future needs. I am about to turn 30, so we were thinking about getting pregnant by late next year. I guess the best made plans are always gonna get broken??? We had gotten dogs soon after we started dating, and now he's keeping them because they will enjoy his backyard (I have non). These puppies are like my kids. I have to give up my love and then my puppies? What is the point? Today I just want to foreclose on my house and have extra money to do whatever I please... or maybe take time off work. I hated every aspect of my life, but was dealing because I could rely on his strength and convictions. He always made me smile when I was down and I'd like to think I did the same for him. For me, the most important thing in life is to live it to the fullest with a partner by my side. It does not mean as much if you don't have that special someone besides you. Going through this forum, I see the raw emotion everyone's in. I feel the same way and wonder if and end will ever be in sight. Many say that time heals all, but I disagree. Time may ease the pain, but the wound is always there... I know from previous hurt. Icyness, I have the same conclusion... all I want is him back in my arms... making a happy life and family. Is that really too much to ask? Any hope I guess can do us in.