fiffy

Hi There, I just wanted to say thank you to FRANFRAN CAS CRAIGIEBABE ENCHANTED771 I just read all your posts following mine and it was so nice to get support. I stopped coming on here because previously noone answered me. I have called my ex today and it just ended up in fighting. He hates me and says my patheticness of calling him makes me repulsive like a little girl. I feel so bad he hates me. He was the one who cheated and ended the relationship but because of my inability to let go I have become the bad person. We split 6 months ago but continued to see each other everyday for a month. I moved away five months ago then he never kept any promises of seeing me. We were meant to be having space but I could not stop calling him. I ruined every chance of reconcilliation. Plus he has shot my self esteem. Everytime I have called he just says he never loved me and was never attracted to me. He said I was fat and unattractive. He said having sex with me was repulsive. Yet he still keeps my picture up on facebook with him since I'm twelve years younger and have long blonde hair so I can't be that repulsive!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't believe we had just begun to try for a baby and now he hates me. Deep down I miss him and want him back. Its killing me. I know now I look so desperate to him he would never want anything to do with me. Why is no contact so hard? 7 days is the most I have ever done. I feel my inability to do it is crazy. I am starting to wonder after six months of being in the same position I am mentally ill. Has anyone else struggled this long????????

Day 5 and messed up!!!!! Can't believe it! I was doing so well! I can't believe I gave in and contacted him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so mad and disappointed! I came home from work and was so sad and in fits of tears about missing my ex. I thought he would have at least tried to contact me in that time- but no! I am just hurting that he doesn't care that he doesn't feel pain. Why is my life in such a mess and he is so happy? It was so good just to talk but I didn't feel satisfied after knowing I broke my own no contact rule and that I let myself down!!!!!!! In short it wasn't worth it!

Hi Babes23 You mentioned that you too struggled to get past day 3. I was wondering how long you have been split up? I have been struggling so bad and feel crazy. I split from my boyfriend 5 months ago. He initially just wanted a break and some time and space but I drove him to the edge with constant obssessive calling shouting accusing everything. I am a sane person so I cannot understand why I behave like this. I was just hoping to find someone who is in a similar situation to me who could help and support. Do you want reconcilliation or are you doing this to banish him from your life? If you want to chat my hotmail account is faykfaith@hotmail.co.uk best wishes xx

Day 2/3 Day 2 was ok. Had to be in London all day and was rushing everywhere to different appointments. Spent the evening with sister and her friends so it was relatively painless. Day 3 was terrible was on the edge of tears for 4 hours on a train was close to calling him, feel so jealous by all the girls who are now his friends on facebook so have deactivated my account to save my pain. I usually cae in by day three so I am happy to have reached day 4!!!!! Can't wait to beat my record of day 6!

Hi everyone Today is my day 1 I have had five months of going from a break to needing space to completely over to him hating me. All that happens if I call is I get needy beg cry plead he sees me as weak puts me down, lowers my self-esteem then tells me to f**k off! I have tried to initiate no contact so many times but too often I give in. The longest was 7 days now I average at 3. Sometimes he just e-mails hey hope your ok after 3 days no contact which just infuriates me and makes me contact him so I have to learn to be stronger. Its so hard for me I want to believe there is still love there by the fact we still speak but looking at the amount of people posting on here I think its a bad sign. I want to have 30 days no contact to see if it would save our relatonship. Does everyone else have that hope? Does it ever happen? Either way I have to do something to regain control.