Shadowfax

Thanks for your advice and comments so far. I did decide to meet up with my friend yesterday and we went to an art gallery together and afterwards, for drinks. I think we both wanted to see whether we really could manage a platonic friendship again. Well, everything started well, mostly small talk. As the evening progressed, however, I could feel us getting closer and closer. It is strangely comforting to be around someone you can truly be completely yourself with. And I find his company so easy. Towards the end of the evening, I could feel an obvious tension between us, it was almost glittering. Before we parted company, he said he was still in love with me and that's when he made a pass. I suppose I now know we cannot be simply friends. Little Red, your situation does sound very much like mine. I'm not sure how to pm though - do I need more posts for this? As regards my marriage, I do love my husband as a friend and companion. I cannot describe him in less than glowing terms because he's very good and kind to me. The main problem we have is that we are now more like friends than husband and wife. Sexually, we have very different drives. His sex drive is very low which I find difficult to deal with. Currently we have sex about once every two/three months. I have broached my unhappiness with this but what can you do? He has a low sex drive, mine is high and this won't change no matter how many times I talk about it. Little Red - what is your marriage like?

I am working myself into a knot over this so I would appreciate feedback on my situation so I can better see the wood for the trees. I am married and have been with my partner for over ten years. My male friend is also married. We do love our partners. But in Feb this year, we started seeing each other without our partners present and entering what could only be described as emotional infidelity. It became sexual after about five months which resulted (within one month) in my telling him we could no longer see each other. I said to him at the time that we should drop all communications for six months and following this, decide what to do. Last month, we started communicating with each other again. I think we both had the idea we could simply re-establish a normal friendship. However, I feel the whole thing is quickly getting out of control again. For example, I knew he wanted a birthday do but without anyone to prompt him, he'd have just let it go. I suggested the do, and supported him in sending out the invites, etc. His birthday was a success and he really enjoyed himself. I was happy for him. We have started emailing each other several times a day and a couple of days ago we spent two hours on the phone to each other. We had intended to meet up for an evening drink next week but now he says he's wants to take the afternoon off so we can spend all day and evening together. He has been warned several times not to make a move on me. But I'm concerned that all of this is once again spiralling. Am I being emotionally unfaithful to my partner by allowing this to continue? He has serious fears about leaving his wife yet his feelings towards me are obvious. He has admitted being 'madly in love' and that this scares him. I unfortunately am in love with him. Yet, I want us to be friends so we can continue seeing each other. He has been a friend for a very long time. I don't know what my next step should be in all of this mess. Advice/suggestions on this would be appreciated.