dazedandconfusedbydestiny

We aren't playing games honestly. He wanted some others views, and i told him to come here.

yes we are.

btw my husband is asking this, so you know its him. I suggested this site for him since you all have helped me alot. Wanda

New girls to hang out with. I don't know about the rest of you. But sounds to me like he's not wanting a date etc.

Yep they do. I have thought about getting my l.p.n liscense or just get my rn since i can get a 2 yrs rn degree in little more then what it takes to get my l.p.n. I have gone through medical assistant training and nurses assitant training. Between the 2 i could petition the state to take my liscense board exam. But been out of school to long.

L.P.N stands for Liscense Practical Nurse not Liscense Nurse Practitioners. Liscense Nurse Practitioners are nurses able to write prescriptions, stand in for doctors etc. Liscense Practical Nurses have only been through technical schooling.

what is wrong. All you need to do is really look at a woman and let nature take it's course.

Btw my husband said that.

How about saying dear lets try some new math, it's called 69

Hope I guess you don't get the point i will never regret that night i had with Bob so you may as well drop it. Hubby knows everything now, and still wants to try and make our marriage work even with the things I told him hes going to have to accept along with getting help for his anger. He either accepts it and we move on, or i move on without him. I really don't care anymore.

congrats to you and the father to be.

agent i totally agree, thats why i'm getting out. If he wants to work things out then there are going to be some stipulations and i wont back down. If he can't agree to them then it's over.

I looked up the same meaning, and if you go by that meaning of a affair unless your married to your partner its a affair also.

raykay the point is no one bothered to ask if the abuse started before or after they assumed it was after. How does the assumption saying go.

I find that people are to quick to assume rather then to ask a simple question.

I agree with jenny. I have noticed all to often when it comes to someone whos been cheated on, or looking for advice regarding a relationship its post after post telling them that they are right to do this blah blah blah. But in my own situation when i ask. All i get is my husband even though hes abusive and doesnt care about anything I want has the right and i should kiss his rear. I'm sorry but yes alot of these boards are one sided.

forgot to mention not only was he constantly saying we need to go home when my dad had his stroke, he rarely was there at all when my dad was in the hospital. He was at the hotel 99 percent of the time in front of the tv.

maggie for one my husband has a very violent temper I believe some of you need to read my other post to catch up.

I have made many compromises in our marriage, and it's all been one sided.

One thing a one night stand is just that a one night stand not a damn affair. It was something that happen because my husband beat me btw that is why i went to chicago in the first place.

I have made alot of compromises in my marriage

1. Staying down here away from my family, my friends etc. Because he wanted to be near his parents.

2. Rarely getting to see my family because hes not comfortable around them.

3. Giving up all my friends in chicago, the life I always knew etc.. Because oh again hubby wanted to be near his parents and family.

4. I wasn't by my dads side when he died, because hubby wanted to come home. He convinced me to come home and get things done and go back if he takes a turn for the worse he died before we could get back. We lived 6 hours away.

There are alot more compromises i have made, but what has hubby done other then to accept a child that isn't his and he doesn't care that the boy isn't. Oh yeah he wants to work out our marriage now that I have told him after putting up with 16 yrs of physical and emotional abuse that it stops now or im leaving. I feel like its a little to late on his part.

My husband new right away he claims, since he knows we didnt have sex around the time the boy was concieved.

As to what I want from my husband, he wants to work on our marriage. Myself I don't see how thats possible unless he compromises also. Bob and I have been friends since 5th and 6th grade. I gave up our friendship 10 yrs ago to make hubby happy but I made myself unhappy.

No dna test isnt needed unless i was pregnant for several months before i found out i was 4 weeks pregnant no the child is not hubbys. Hubby has accepted that. He also wants to move forward. He doesn't want to lose me either.

Which only makes things more difficult then ever. He at least knows where I stand, and I have told him I don't think we can move beyond this point he does. Even though I have told him I will not stop talking to Bob again. He will either have to accept it or i am moving on.

I tell hubby unless things change soon. I will be leaving him. Now hes totally attentive. Wants to spend time with me etc.. If I can get any more confused I don't know if I would have sanity left.

Yes he now knows I still love Bob. Yes he now knows theres a good chance that I may not return from Chicago. He does know I am as confused as ever and I can't make any decisions regarding anything past July 1st until I speak with Bob. Because I do not know what he will say. I never gave him a chance to speak for himself in 13 yrs and it is time I give him that chance.

I do know if hubby and I are to get past this point, he is going to have to accept what happen 13 yrs ago. Hes going to have to accept that Christopher may be Bobs child and get test to prove one way or another. He is going to have to accept that if he is Bobs child. Bob will be able to meet Christopher etc. He is also going to have to accept that I will never stop talking to Bob again. Our friendship was more then I can describe. Losing it because I pushed Bob out of my life to make hubby happy was the hardest thing I ever did. I do not want to go through that again. Now that I am in contact with him.

I told him I do not plan to thrust everything on Christopher. But I want bob to have a chance to meet him. From there what happens who knows.

Life seems to be getting more confusing then ever. I just hope i can make it through the next 34 days without losing my sanity.

Wanda

I just would like to know, why my heart aches so bad. I know it's over.

I know from the way he reacted about our son that it will just fester and fester and he wont ever forget or forgive me.

Just like any other mistake I have made in our marriage, hes going to let it fester til he explodes and I won't be around for him to use his fist or what ever else he wants to.

I should feel glad, that I have finally come out and told him our marriage is over unless things change. But I know in my heart it won't change.

Good bye to 16 yrs of marriage.

I plan to go through with it. I am past fed up.

We have been married 16 yrs next month. He knows everything he just acts so distance all the time. Spends no time doing anything with me, hes to tired, or sore or what ever excuse he comes up with.

Told hubby tonight that unless things change dramatically soon its over. I can't keep living like this. He said he will try and improve on showing me some affection etc. But thats what he said 6 months ago and it hasnt changed.

Don't know if I should feel relieved that I told him, sad that it has come to this point or what.

I don't think he had a right to go through your friends list and delete people he didn't want you to talk to. You made a mistake and regret doing so. If he can't move on then its not ment to be.

I am married 16 yrs and i had a one night stand also with a man who just happen to be my best friend. I have to say I never regreted it. But I do regret that I never set anyone straight about it til now.

i agree with slighlybent