sddeaston

Smoking is a bad habit.

I find it VERY pathetic when people base their life or their attitude off the size of their wanger.

I am pretty much the same way ren. It's weird how trying to please others, doing something that makes you feel good, eventually hinders you.

It's like looking after yourself or stating what you want in certain situations feels selfish to you, or like it would embarrass you. Well, at least that is how it is for me. I have tried very, very hard to reverse this but it is something that is always there for me. My default. Something I am so used to doing that I don't even think about it anymore. Althouth, it has improved a small amount with age.

I thought I was a rarity, perhaps I am not as unique as I thought

I tend to think that if one has thoughts of person b while in a relationship with person a, the relationship must be lacking somewhere. Or that person does not have full respect for their current partner.

If I was your boyfriend I would want to know of these feelings, so I could leave you be, and let you figure it out on your own. I do not want to *even possibly* be a back up.

Yep, I think that taking your time to just enjoy where you are at that moment totally makes the whole experience a better one. Its especially good with the right person. Ah man, makes me miss having someone around.

I could never understand the people who only want the quick sessions, all the time. Sure its nice to sometimes just throw things off the nearest platform and go at it, thats fun too. But not every time. Boring to me.

where do you hang out?

Haha. I was going to ask the same question earlier, glad someone else did.

I wouldn't worry bout him, who cares what he knows or thinks? But, I may entertain thoughts of laying off the syrup for the time being. Unless of course this particular incident is not isolated and does not bother you, aside from the ex knowing.

You could do it like Stuart Smalley in his Daily Affirmations, an older SNL sketch. He'd always say:

 

I'm good enough,

I'm smart enough,

And dog-on-it, people like me

 

lol

 

That's what I always think of when I hear the word affirmations. Does anyone else remember this? (Hopefully someone will.)

Ha ha. Thats what I think of when I hear the word "affirmations". Funny you said something, I was going to mention it myself.

Especially like the line: "And dog-on-it, people like me." That segment was hilarious.

I also think that something should be said for quality over quantity. One really good night in bed will leave you with an after glow that can last a long time.

Or leave you with that night on your mind, making you want more than usual. For me, it would definitely make me want more.

Why play games? Its a relationship. Tell him you will drive there tonight, if he will drive to you this weekend.

My ex said she could feel it inside her. And unprotected is definitely much, MUCH better. As long as you don't have to worry about anything later on. That part sucks.

If they tell you "I want you back".

Also notice that the OP said he has *tried* being the "nice guy", the "romantic", the "bad boy" etc...

IMO, that is a reason right there that sustaining a relationship is difficult. How can someone fall in love, and stay in love, with someone who is acting?

I think it is easier to develop a deeper, truer connection with someone if they fall in love with you, for being who you are and not who they want you to be. I admit, I did this too. It caused me a lot of pain down the road, as now I have a son from that girl and we ended up in a bad break up. That is truly a very hard situation to stomach, and one I could have avoided altogether if I had been myself. Either she would have left because I was not what she wanted, or she would have been in love with ME, and not a fictitious (sp?) me.

brilliant

 

 

Locke, I know its mushy... I dont really know what girls normally want to hear with things like this

 

But aren't you....a girl?

Ha. I have no idea where it came from. I just found it funny so I suggested he go ahead with it. Good analogy though, Ash. I agree.

Definitely super glue a GI Joe figure to the end of it.

When I graduated high school, my girlfriend and I stayed together. I went to college a year after I graduated and at that point we were still together. When I got to college and realized the opportunities, I had it in me to break up with her. When I would go back home, we were in the EXACT situation you and your boyfriend are in, and it was like we were together, but without the label. We had the "I love you's", the intimacy and sex, everything.

The problem was that I knew it was there, no matter what so I kept it that way. As bad as I feel for it now, I can understand it a little bit, because it was awesome for a teenage male, with no heart, to have all of that at his fingertips. It took me a long time to realize what I did to her, and by that time, she was married. We are friends now, only cuz she is a wonderful person and I have since made every effort I could to make up for that (not in a stalker-come back to me way, but trying to befriend her), although that may be impossible...

My point is that you should not expect anything from this guy. I do think he has much the same mentality that I did at that time in my life. He may grow up, but may not. Cut the loss, and don't take the chance to see if he does, because you can find someone that is emotionally more mature, and the end result will be much better. I do know it is hard to face that fact, but it is much less painful than being hurt by someone you love unconditionally. Which, unfortunately has already started happening.

I hope you understand the nature of my post. It was not to put his actions in your face, or justify them. I wanted to make you understand what I did to my x-girlfriend, without remorse *at the time* I hope you find it helpful.

I know of a few people who worked *multiple* jobs they hated because their family needed it. Those people never complained. They just worked.

There should be a P.E. forum....

Wow, that's an incredibly unfortunate situation, especially for your husband. I think it's obvious that you need to stay far, far away from your brother in law. You shouldn't be exchanging glances because you clearly shouldn't even be in the same room. And the hugs and kisses? That's trashy.

Heh. Trashy sums it up nicely.

I am attracted/in love with my husband's brother, and so is he.

But we have never ever, and never will, go as far as your bf is going.

I think you are not paranoid and may very well be on to something there.

My brother in law and I feel on sky nine if we just exchange glances when no-one is looking; then sometimes a kiss or a hug lingers that extra moment that tells all about how comfortable we feel in each other's arms, but I think what your bf is doing is a serious lack of respect.

You did not say what you relation with your sister is.

She does not seem to be too loyal either, does she? And how do you know she has no feelings for him?

 

In any case, the best of luck to you...

Thats an incredible story.

Why are you married?

.....what would you say if you read your post?

That's incredibly offensive. He allowed this to happen directly in front of you. Disrespectful to the fullest. Not only did he condone her behavior, but showed no true emotions for you when she got physical.

No true rememdies. Just know that it DOES get better, no matter how you feel right now. There isn't much that won't hurt you right now, as this is still very early. Just do things to keep your mind busy. Do stuff that is fun to you.

I got a prescription for zyban from my normal doctor. After I started taking those, I quit without looking back. I had used the patch, gone cold turkey...everything. For some reason, the zyban totally took ANY edge off the cravings.

Its spendy, but well worth it.

LMFAO!!! Yeah the police are in a good mood though atm because it's the year of the pig!

 

Weed is a known remedy for period stuff. The other one is simply a hot water bottle. I have nursed many women through severe period cramps (one woman I was with had chronic endimetriosis) - a hot water bottle, some good quality weed, and a coffee seem to perk them up a bit!

 

Other than that there's no magical cure.

 

BTW - Yvette - that can't be you in your avatar, surely.

HA HA HA! Right on.

I was going to suggest the same thing.

Weed is a great way to relax. I have smoked regularly for quite some time, have not gotten any dumb*er* and I have to say, HONESTLY, it has helped me with my asthma. Immensley.

I would venture to guess that it could help you in your situation. But, I would say that if you are against it, its probably not a good idea.

Btw, what could a cop do if they were watching this board? (just a statemtent really, not meant to hijack the thread)

I would be less worried about how far you run, than I would be worried about the amount of time you run for. Its not about distance, it is about getting your heart rate up, and sustaining it for extended periods of time. Strengthening the heart muscle is your goal.

As for the diet, if you are obese I would say that the diet may be a good thing. If you are just overweight, or just want to trim up a little bit, stop counting carbs and calories. You are 19, diet is important, but the amount of what you eat is something I have found younger people to be more at battle with.

Portion control. Don't leave any meal filled to the rim. Leave satisfied, and not hungry. Big difference.

Diet IS important. Don't get me wrong. But you don't have to starve yourself, and you don't have to eat foods without taste or foods that are "boring" in order to obtain an ideal weight. Just be aware of the foods that you DO eat. By aware, I mean don't go out and eat just a little bit of greasy fast food, eat a moderate amount of something with nutritional value.

I found that when I did this, the fat came off just the same. Also, when you are lifting weights, be aware that muscle mass weighs more than fat. What this means is that you will see your weight go down one week, and the next it will stay the same. Don't get discouraged, what you are really worried about is the fat, not your weight.

I have lifted weights and done cardio for years, am in great shape, happy with my body and I don't watch calories or count carbs. I just eat things that are not loaded with fat.