lost4ever

Thank you so much everyone! I really needed all this advice. Right now I don't feel strong enough to leave. I will try to gather up my strength to do it but in the meantime I will also see if we could work out our communication towards each other. Maybe I'm just giving excuses to stay. I don't know. I will definetely take some time to let your thoughts sink in so that I can do the right thing for myself. I need to reevaluate what I want from him, myself and this relationship.

i love him so much and he really is a good man. i feel that if he just can control his anger and understand me more that he will change. He doesn't physically harm me and he treats me like a queen when we aren't fighting. should i still leave and give up trying? i understand that this is bad for me emotionally and maybe mentally but i have a feeling that may be he will change. i just need to know how to help him become a better person during a fight. i don't know what to do to be honest. do you think that it would be ok if i at least tried to help him as much as i could?

I'm new and need help badly. My boyfriend and I moved in together after a month of being together. We've now been together for almost a year. We always fight. We've been fighting since we met. I'm not happy but love him sooo much. The problem is that he gets angry all the time and gets on some kind of power trip. I used to be able to handle the fighting but now it's gotten so bad that I hate myself, I cry hard, I take the blame even when it isn't my fault. I've started to give up trying to work things out. I'm getting weaker and losing my self esteem and pride. I need space to really think about this but he won't let me go without a fight or a break up. Sometimes when I or he decides to break up and I start packing, I start to think to myself how much I love him and don't really want to leave, so I don't. I want this relationship to work out so badly and I try but sometimes I don't think he is really trying. I tell him exactly how I feel but I don't think he listens to me and really is doing anything about his anger issues. Every fight, whether it's my fault or not, ends up where I'm saying sorry, it's my fault. Also he always puts me down and calls me names that hurt like hell and he thinks just because he can handle stuff like that, that I'm strong enough to handle his constant name calling and putting me down when we fight. I'm losing myself and my strength to stay. I really want to stay because he is a good man and he is good to me WHEN WE DON'T fight. I don't know how to make this work. I don't want to call it quits. How do I save this relationship without losing myself?