My fiancé and I have been together for a little over 3 years. In the beginning of our relationship our sex life was fantastic. We literally had sex every night, sometimes several times. But now… things are so different. I’m lucky if we have sex once every 3 weeks or so. I feel like he doesn’t find me attractive anymore.
He downloads a lot of porn and looks at a lot of dirty magazines and masturbates all the time. So I know his sex drive is there. But it seems like he’s more interested in having sex with himself than he is with me. I’ve tried spicing things up by wearing costumes, using toys, suggesting we do something in public… and it may work for a night… but after that he’s right back to not being interested again.
It’s a big issue in our relationship because I’m a young woman who enjoys having sex… and I could probably get laid more if I were single than I do being in this relationship!! But I love him.. But I’m not satisfied. I do anything he asks me to do in the bedroom but he refuses to go down on me. (He’s never tried it before.. on any woman and for some reason won’t do it)
Last night he was in the shower and I walked in to wash my hands and he was masturbating. I made a joke out of it and he said to me ‘Would you just give it a rest!’. This upset me and I replied ‘Oh so I’m not allowed to be upset by the fact you enjoy having sex with yourself more than you do with me’ and he said ‘frankly babe. I don’t care’
That hurt me A LOT. And I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if we can fix things because I seem to be the only one who’s doing anything to help. I’m sick of the porn and I’m sick of feeling unattractive.
Does anyone have any suggestions?
