Thanks for the reply.
The issue is that these feelings I have for this other woman seem so real, and its definitely not lust, it feels like having met a 'soul mate'. Maybe I am so tired of being in a relationship with an 'eternally' depressed partner, for all intents and purposes my wife is doing everything to recover of course, but still I feel in prison, cannot say what i really feel because I am always afriad of repurcussions on her recovery ect. Spent a long time even being afraid of leaving her alone because of her suicidal thoughts ect. Its not only my wife who has problems though. Recently after these feelings for this woman, I reliased and this was very scary to realise, that over the years, since the relationship with my wife began, i made a lot of mistakes in my life, second thoughts put under the bridge, doubts and the like, that I never took time to analyse correctly, and acted as if nothing was really happening. Now I just stop and realise that I am not happy in my life, especially in my relationship and the feelings for this woman made me realize this even more. Its not much that I want to substitute the relationship I have with my wife with the realtionship with this other woman, maybe its nothing and will die a natural death. But the mere fact of having thought about this other woman for most of the time, thinking about changing my life, ending my marriage, maybe meeting her is serving as an eye opener to change. And it very scary to see your life episodes in front of you and being able to spot the instances when you made mistakes like getting married too soon, not enjoy life as much as possible before getting married, personal development, not illuding myself that all problems will solve automatically