Canadakid

twenty two years married and never once cheated. Even after my first child was born and because of my wife's post=partum issues she wanted nothing (and I mean NOTHING) to do with me for about a year...but I had made a committment to that young guy we had and i stuck it out and eventually things worked out. And I'm not looking for a medal, but I know that there are lots and lots of people who would have crossed over under those circumstances.I guess the secret is don't go fishing unless you want to catch a fish. And maybe I've been lucky too, because over the years there have been a few occasions where I've gotten to know some pretty great women and once or twice I've said to myself "look out kid, because this one would be V-E -R-Y hard to say no to"...so you make sure you never get put into the position of having to say no

But i don't think I can., and i hope people don't just think this belongs in some human resources forum because it goes deeper on a variety of levels. After months of suspicion I am 100% certain that my best employee --who is also a good friend--(female..about 40...married...3 kids) is having an affair for about a year now with one of my best clents (male...about 50...married...some kids)... there's lots of trouble brewing here. I know that these things almost always end badly and if this ends badly, I could end up losing both my best client and my best employee and a good friend. My wife and I socialize with this woman and her husband commonlyand this will make our frienship awkward as well. And I wouldn't be being honest if I didn't say that I have a lot of affection for this woman and truly think she's a fine person and I really like her husband and kids so this whole thing is also breaking my heart and I know that I'm not being "business objective" like I should be. my As if that's not enough, the client is responsible for city business and public trust and all that. So this is not like employee is having an affair with her poolboy(none of my business) or employee is having an affair with some private business owner (maybe my business) but this IS my business because she has brought it into my business..and if this were to blow up on HIS side...."public works commissioner involved in affair with vendor", even though I have no reason to doubt her business integrity and this is NOT sleeping with someone to get the business (but try telling THAT to the investigator) there could be all sorts of conflict-of-interest charges and for all I know the whole tawdry mess could end up in the newspaper and then there could be two marriages, three careers -- because maybe mine too -- and my company's reputation all flushed away in no time. I also find out that she has been using our cell phone for making long daily calls and assignation arrangement with her boyfriend, I'm getting informed of 'lots of mail' coming to her from him (so people in my office are starting to put 2 + 2 together)and I also found out that when she went away on a business trip (that I paid for and included expenses so that she could take her husband) that she took the boyfriend and left the husband at home. and I also find out that her office is a depository for all of his love letters etc. and now for the grand finale I get a typed note at my home today from a "friend" and all this note has on it is her home phone number and another phone number that a quick run to the phonebook turned out to belong to guess who... So how do I handle all of this? Do I confront her...do I put my head in the sand...do I assign another representative to the client so I can have some separation?...do I fire her? Every option I can think of is lousy so I need some input in order to settle my mind..and heart..and soul over this problem